Me: Dave is outside looking incredibly focussed.
Nell: He’s probably waiting for Tony.
Me: No, he’s staring at the roof.
Nell: I hope he isn’t trying to find the internet again. I don’t know how many times I’ve explained to him that it isn’t actually a thing you can see.
Me: Well, I wish it would come back on. It’s been nearly 24 hours now.
Nell: I know. I’ve had to cancel several meetings and my zoom session with the Young Animals.
Me: Dave must be staring at something.
Nell: Is he bowing?
Nell: What about saluting?
Me: No. He’s standing perfectly still.
Nell: It can’t be the Magpies then.
Me: No, there’s one on the gate though.
Nell: Is it Bonnie or Clyde?
Me: I can’t tell them apart.
Nell: Clyde sometimes wears a hat.
Me: This magpie is hatless. Probably Bonnie casing the joint.
Nell: It’s a garden not a joint and why have you suddenly started speaking in an American accent?
Me: Never mind.
Nell: I suggest you go outside and see who is on the roof.
Me: Well, that wasn’t what I expected to see.
Nell: What is it?
Me: A Beefy with a pizza.
Nell: No wonder David is focussed.
Me: I don’t think he ordered it.
Nell: Is it still in its box?
Nell: How do you know it’s pizza?
Me: It’s a pizza box and the Beefy is wearing a delivery sort of cap.
Nell: It’s probably for Walter.
Me: Yes, why didn’t I think of that?
Nell: You do realise we’re going to have pizza all over the roof again. Those pigeons are so messy and they don’t share.
Me: Poor Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy pointlessly pining for pizza from a pigeon.
Nell: Good grief.