
Me: There’s something wonderfully calming about watching dogs sleeping.
Nell: Here we go.
Me: Look at the way the morning sun highlights the warm tones of Harriet’s chocolate brown fur.
Nell: Good grief.
Me: While her brother Dave snoozes away in shiny black Labrador bliss.
Nell: How do you know David is in bliss?
Me: He ate three bacon sandwiches. Two on purpose and one by mistake.
Nell: How can you eat a bacon sandwich by mistake?
Me: Poppy made it for Gladys but one of the llamas twisted its ankle cartwheeling so she had to leave it and go and find an ankle support.
Nell: What’s that got to do with David?
Me: Dave’s in charge of clearing up today.
Nell: I know he is, I write the roster. Why wasn’t the sandwich wrapped up and put aside for later?
Me: It had already gone.
Nell: Down David’s throat?
Me: It was an easy mistake to make.
Nell: David simply cannot grasp the concept of Leftovers no matter how many times I try to explain it.
Me: I think most Labradors struggle with the idea.
Nell: Excuse me? Why mention Labradors?
Me: Well, you are known for your greediness.
Nell: Greediness? We are not greedy. We are Interested and Supportive.
Me: You can say that again.
Nell: Why should I? You heard me the first time.
Me: Never mind.
Nell: I’m afraid we Labradors are hugely misunderstood.
Me: That reminds me, the vet says your weight is the same as last time and we need to get it down.
Nell: One should never discuss a lady’s age or weight.
Me: It’s because of your arthritis.
Nell: Don’t even think of offering me a carrot with my mid-morning tea. Shortbread or nothing.
Me: It’s going to be nothing then. Sorry.