Nell: You’re not going to believe this.
Me: I just might.
Nell: Tony’s downstairs in the kitchen eating chocolate with David and Harriet.
Me: They’re not allowed chocolate.
Nell: They’re not eating it. But they want to.
Me: Good. Isn’t it a little bit early for chocolate?
Nell: There’s more.
Me: Tell me.
Nell: Knitwear Wolf is at the other end of the table eating cheese and biscuits with Lionel King.
Me: Who eats cheese and biscuits for breakfast?
Nell: I know. The world has gone mad.
Me: What’s wrong with a nice bacon sandwich?
Nell: My thoughts exactly.
Me: Where’s Poppy? Surely she can’t approve of this kind of breakfast?
Nell: Poppy has her paws full filleting a mackerel for Stephen Seagull. He’s having it lightly grilled with a boiled egg on the side.
Me: Isn’t that usually Malcolm’s job?
Nell: Malcolm is far too busy rehearsing with Alejandro for tonight’s semi final. Anyway, that’s not the point.
Nell: It’s not the food that’s worrying me most. It’s the guests.
Me: Tony is welcome any time.
Nell: Not Tony. I mean that wretched lion and obnoxious seagull.
Me: All we need now is Myfanwy and Lady Anwen.
Nell: Don’t hold your breath.
Nell: Never mind.
Me: Knitwear Wolf shouldn’t be eating biscuits.
Nell: That’s what I told him but he just smiled and said not to worry.
Me: Poppy said the same thing to me about the shortbread. Does Tony seem worried?
Nell: No. He was his usual cheery self.
Me: Only it’s not every day you sit down to eat with a lion and a seagull. Not to mention a wolf, three Labradors, and a terrier filleting fish.
Nell: It’s most days to be fair, apart from the lion and seagull.
Me: True. Sorry.