Me: Have you seen my darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy?
Nell: Yes, he’s outside on his lounger playing Cheeky Animals.
Me: Who is he playing with? I can’t see anyone.
Nell: Nobody. He’s just practising.
Me: But you can’t practise without someone else.
Nell: Of course you can. How on earth do you think Poppy became champion?
Me: Talking of Poppy? Have she and Harriet sorted out their differences?
Nell: Yes, the shock of Poppy’s dancing partner put all thoughts of Elliot out of their heads.
Me: That sounds worrying. Who is it?
Nell: Stephen Seagull.
Me: Stephen Seagull? The evil head of the Beefies?
Nell: Yes, that one.
Me: Oh my goodness. Poppy is going to have her paws full.
Nell: Personally I think it’s an excellent decision. She rarely dances without her sword.
Me: He’s a nasty piece of work.
Nell: Yes, it seems extraordinary to me that such a villain can have sweet Susan as his daughter.
Me: Humphrey Heron brought her up.
Nell: True. You know Susan is dancing too, don’t you?
Me: I had no idea. With Malcolm?
Nell: Don’t be silly. Malcolm’s not a professional dancer.
Me: No, I didn’t think so. Who is Susan’s professional partner then?
Nell: Babycakes Gillespie.
Me: That’s an interesting combination.
Nell: I thought so, too.
Me: Was that your iBone?
Nell: It’s just my friend Dorothy.
Me: The Salcombe Setter?
Nell: Yes. She’s been tinging me all morning.
Me: Maybe you should see what she has to say.
Nell: You are not going to believe this.
Me: I just might.
Nell: Dorothy has been paired with Paolo the Portuguese Podenco.
Me: I didn’t know Dorothy was a dancer.
Nell: She isn’t. When will you realise that only one in each pair is a professional?
Me: Oh yes. Sorry.