Nell: Have you seen Harriet? David needs her right now.
Me: Don’t disturb her, Nell. She’s on the yellow chair with Kev having Special Cuddles.
Nell: We don’t have time for that.
Me: But you should see her little face. It’s all slitty eyed and smiley.
Nell: What are you talking about?
Me: You know the way her face goes when she’s feeling emotional.
Nell: Harriet is in charge of logging all sightings. She can’t just lounge around cuddling.
Me: Can’t Dave do the logging himself?
Nell: Certainly not. Those binoculars are heavy.
Me: Is it the pearl wearing Beefy again?
Nell: Yes, and it’s brought along a friend.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: In a diamond tiara.
Me: How inappropriate.
Nell: Yes. That’s exactly what I said to my friend Dorothy. Who wears a tiara on a Friday morning?
Me: Is Dorothy here then?
Nell: No, I texted her on our WoofsApp group.
Me: What’s the group called? The Nosey Barkers? See what I did there?
Nell: Very funny.
Me: I wonder why the Beefies are wearing the stolen jewellery instead of selling it.
Nell: Beefies are notoriously greedy and excessively rude. They like nothing more than to flaunt and taunt.
Me: You are right.
Nell: It’s the same when they steal chips and ice cream from innocent tourists down on the quay. They can’t resist flying around screaming.
Me: They are very loud.
Nell: And tone deaf. A Beefy could never join a choir. They can’t hold a tune.
Me: Would they want to?
Nell: Oh yes. Several attempts have been made to join the Welsh Corgi Choir.
Nell: As if wearing a fur hat is going to deceive anyone.
Nell: Anyway, tell Harriet the cuddles are over. There’s logging to do.
Me: Yes. Sorry.