Nell: May I have a word with you, please?
Me: Oh dear. What have I done now?
Nell: I believe Harriet spent the night upstairs in your bedroom?
Me: Yes, she did.
Nell: I know Poppy is allowed to share the bed.
Nell: And I accept that. Poppy works hard and needs her sleep.
Me: It’s got more to do with being small.
Nell: I beg your pardon?
Me: A Labrador on the bed is like a whole other person. Or even two in Dave’s case.
Nell: Moving on. I would like to ask why Harriet has now also been given Bedroom Privileges?
Me: She isn’t allowed on the bed at night. She has to sleep in her dog bed. It was Kev’s idea.
Nell: Was it? Well, that makes a huge difference.
Me: He says Harriet was getting lonely. She was waking us all up early because she needed to be with us.
Me: I said it was nonsense. She would start making a noise and it would be even worse.
Nell: And what happened?
Me: She was as quiet as a mouse and waited for us to wake up.
Nell: Problem solved. You just need to listen to Kev. Such an excellent idea.
Me: Hang on a minute. You were complaining about it a minute ago.
Nell: That was before I knew the whole story. Anyway, people seemed to enjoy The Growl on Sunday.
Me: Yes, although some went into Junk mail so best to check that if you haven’t received it.
Nell: We’ve already had a few questions for Poppy and Dave so please keep them coming. Just email us at email@example.com.
Me: If it was up to me, Nell, I would give you Bedroom Privileges.
Nell: Too little too late.