Me: Our very own seaweed monster. I think Harriet might actually be a merdog.

Nell: There is no such thing.

Me: Stranger things have happened.

Nell: Now, I hope you are not thinking of paddle boarding any time soon.

Me: I must say it’s not high on my list of priorities.

Nell: Only if you are, then don’t. It is far too windy at the moment and people are being swept out to sea.

Me: Oh dear. How dreadful.

Nell: Fortunately Knitwear Wolf is a proficient paddle boarder with years of experience.

Me: Yes, I think he was paddle boarding the first time we saw him.

Nell: Anyway, with the help of Princess, Our Penguin and Manuel he is going to be holding seawise classes.

Me: Seawise?

Nell: Yes. Knowing how to deal with difficult and dangerous situations at sea.

Me: That’s an awfully good idea.

Nell: It is. Everyone is signing up.

Me: Count me in. I have my gold personal survival swimming award but that was quite a long time ago.

Nell: Over fifty years in fact.

Me: There is no need to be that specific, thank you Nell.

Nell: Just saying.

Me: I won’t have to wear a wetsuit, will I?

Nell: Not for the theory part of it. I think you might feel quite hot and uncomfortable.

Me: Maybe I can do the practical side of things when the sea is a little warmer.

Nell: Don’t be such a wimp. You sound just like The Cat. It screamed when it saw the wetsuit had no sequins.

Me: Has The Cat really agreed to take part in the seawise classes?

Nell: Of course it has. Everyone is going. Gladys and the llamas, the whole of the Welsh corgi choir and even Henry and Horst.

Me: Gosh. Sorry.

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