Me: I never get tired of seeing those two together. Look at my Big Brave Beautiful Boy. He is so happy.

Nell: I know. They really are the best of friends.

Me: I wonder what Tony thinks of the new Book the Beefy service.

Nell: David says he’s not happy about it at all. Letters and parcels are getting all fishy and people are complaining.

Me: Fishy? Why?

Nell: People have had mackerel posted through their letterboxes.

Me: I’m surprised a mackerel can get through a letterbox.

Nell: It can’t. It just hangs out of it. But that’s not the point. The Beefies are not supposed to touch the letterboxes.

Me: I thought I saw Romeo with a rose in his beak this morning.

Nell: You probably did. It’s part of the Valentine’s Day promotion. Just go on the app and you’ll see it.

Me: What app?

Nell: The Book a Beefy app. Good grief. Do keep up.

Me: Oh yes. You told me about it.

Nell: I think it’s called ‘Surprise a Loved One’.

Me: Anyone would be surprised if Squawk turned up on their doorstep. Does Susan know yet?

Nell: No. But she’s having tea with Terry this afternoon.

Me: Where?

Nell: Here. Poppy is making finger sandwiches, crusts off, and tiny fairy cakes. David will be waiting on them.

Me: Are you sure that’s wise?

Nell: They need to be able to talk quietly.

Me: I meant letting Dave serve.

Nell: David is excellent at Front of House.

Me: Does Susan know Terry is invited?

Nell: No. She thinks she’s having tea with me.

Me: Well, that’s taking ‘Surprise a Loved One’ to a whole new level. Meet your half brother. You haven’t invited Squawk too, have you?

Nell: Credit me with some sense.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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