Behind You

Nell: Is David behind me?

Me: Not really. Why are you asking?

Nell: You are not very good at this, you know.

Me: Good at what?

Nell: You are supposed to shout ‘He’s behind you!’

Me: I didn’t want to give him away. He’s my Big Brave Beautiful Boy. I thought he might be going incognito and I didn’t want to spoil it.

Nell: Going incognito? What are you talking about? We are rehearsing some of his moves.

Me: What moves?

Nell: For the pantomime. You are supposed to give him away. You didn’t think I really couldn’t see him, did you? It is David we are talking about here.

Me: Oh, I see.

Nell: One of your pantomime duties will be to lead the audience so you will need to concentrate and get this right.

Me: I’m a bit tired, to be honest.

Nell: I don’t mean concentrate now. I mean during the performance.

Me: But I was supposed to shout just now.

Nell: That was just a gentle rehearsal next to your bed. A little warm up.

Me: I’ve just had a dreadful thought.

Nell: Here we go.

Me: Am I the warm up act?

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: The one who goes on before the show to get everyone excited.

Nell: I know what a warm up act is.

Me: Only I’m not very good at jokes, Nell.

Nell: You are not the warm up act and you are not going on stage.

Me: Ok.

Nell: Princess is doing that and she will also be in the audience. We might as well put those clapping skills of hers to use.

Me: That’s a relief. He’s still behind you, by the way.

Nell: You are going to have to work on this.

Me: I know. Sorry.

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