Me: It was wonderful to be back on our beach again, wasn’t it?

Nell: Yes, it was.

Me: Look at you with your ears flapping in the wind.

Nell: They weren’t flapping. They were gently blown forward.

Me: Harriet just adores the water.

Nell: I know.

Me: Dave can cover the whole beach in a matter of minutes. Did you see him run and run?

Nell: David is a large animal.

Me: Talking of large animals. Are they going to be in the pantomime?

Nell: Of course.

Me: Good.

Nell: There’s a slight question mark over Olive the Other Reindeer, as she has a number of commitments during the festive season, but we’re hoping she can join in.

Me: Now, you might not like this idea, Nell, but I wondered if you could include Babycakes Gillespie?

Nell: Good grief.

Me: I think he’s a little bit lonely. I saw him wheeling his bagel cart into town yesterday and his ears were quite low.

Nell: I suppose he can audition. No harm in that.

Me: What about me?

Nell: What about you?

Me: Will there be something for me to do? Only I’m often not included and Kev is.

Nell: Kev used to be an actor. He’s trained. You just concentrate on doing what you do best.

Me: Singing?

Nell: Definitely not. Quietly observing in the background and writing things down.

Me: I was hoping for a part. Just a little one. I know I can’t be one of the Seven Woofs as they are all dogs, but I could be a Huntsman.

Nell: A Huntsman? You can’t be allowed a weapon. The mere idea. Anyway, there’s no Huntsman in this story and the Woofs are not all dogs, by the way. Henry and Horst are auditioning.

Me: I see. Sorry.

Me: Something strange is going on.

Nell: Surely not.

Me: Poppy and Harriet are in the field.

Nell: There’s nothing strange about that.

Me: Looking at the sky and showing their teeth.

Nell: Are there any Beefies around?

Me: I can’t see any.

Nell: What do you mean by showing their teeth?

Me: Harriet is staring open mouthed at the sky and Poppy is waving her muddy paws in the air.

Nell: Are you sure they aren’t singing?

Me: Actually, they might be.

Nell: That explains everything then.

Me: But Sunday Songs was yesterday, Nell.

Nell: Well, yes. The name rather gives it away.

Me: So, why are they singing?

Nell: They’re probably practicing for the auditions.

Me: What auditions?

Nell: For the pantomime. Do keep up.

Me: Have you decided what you’re putting on?

Nell: Yes, after a lot of discussion and a family vote.

Me: I didn’t vote.

Nell: Why not? Kev did.

Me: I didn’t know there was a vote.

Nell: You were probably writing. We all know there’s no point in disturbing you.

Me: You should have told me.

Nell: We thought you’d seen the emails.

Me: What emails?

Nell: It’s not my fault if you never check your Inbox when you’re writing.

Me: Which panto did you all choose then?

Nell: ‘Snow Bite and the Seven Woofs’.

Me: Don’t you mean Dwarfs?

Nell: No. I hope you’re not referring to the vertically challenged amongst us.

Me: Never mind. What’s the story?

Nell: Snow Bite lives in the Frozen North. She is very naughty so she is sent to live Down South with the Woof Family who live by the sea.

Me: I’ve never heard that version.

Nell: Kev knows it. Anyway, both Harriet and Poppy want to play Snow Bite.

Me: Oh, I see. Sorry.

Me: Can I have a quick word?

Nell: It’s Sunday morning. I thought we agreed that today would be a day of rest.

Me: I know, but it’s ever so foggy outside.

Nell: And?

Me: I can hardly see the Welsh corgi choir.

Nell: They’re Welsh. They’re used to rain.

Me: That’s a bit harsh. I was wondering if Sunday Songs could take place in The Barn during these colder months.

Nell: I don’t know how many times I’ve told you this. Singing can only take place outside. At a distance.

Me: It’s just they look so lonely and cold.

Nell: Do stop. Poppy has organised mugs of hot tea and shortbread biscuits after the singing and they all have warm scarves and thick socks courtesy of Manuel.

Me: Talking of Manuel. Is there any reason why he is wearing an owl on his head?

Nell: Beefies hate owls.

Me: I know.

Nell: We found one of our owl hats so we thought it might deter them.

Me: It’s worth a try, I suppose. Maybe The Cat could make him a feathered cloak.

Nell: The Cat has other things on its mind at the moment.

Me: What?

Nell: The Christmas Pantomime.

Me: Is it still going ahead?

Nell: Apparently.

Me: How exciting. That’s something to look forward to.

Nell: Personally, I am looking forward to one of Poppy’s roast dinners with all the trimmings.

Me: By the way, did you know Rupert Bear is 100 years old today?

Nell: I did actually. Rupert and I were discussing it over breakfast.

Me: Do you mean Rupert Bear was here? Having breakfast? In our kitchen?

Nell: Rupert Bear is a fictional character. I was talking to Prince Rupert. Knitwear Wolf. Do try and be a little more realistic.

Me: Of course. Sorry.

Me: Why is Dave looking so concerned?

Nell: It’s the yodelling. David has keen ears and it is driving him mad.

Me: Yes, I have to admit the novelty has worn off. I can hear bells, too, but the cows aren’t wearing any.

Nell: The Beefies are wearing them. It’s not enough to yodel their way across Devon they have to wear bells now, too.

Me: Gosh. They are such annoying birds.

Nell: Annoying and rude. Did you hear what one of them shouted at Manuel?

Me: No.

Nell: ‘Socktopus’. They’ve obviously heard about his knitting.

Me: Do you think so?

Nell: Yes. He didn’t understand the reference of course. He’s from Barcelona.

Me: I don’t think he understands much English at all. He just smiles and says ‘Que?’

Nell: Yes. It’s rather endearing. I hope he doesn’t start clapping himself, though. He spends an awful lot of time with Princess in her pool and she never stops.

Me: It’s a seal thing. Do you think the Beefies are planning something?

Nell: I wouldn’t be surprised.

Me: We are going to have to protect him, Nell. We can’t let him be squidnapped. See what I did there?

Nell: This is not a laughing matter. Now that the Beefies are aware of his knitting talents he may well be in danger.

Me: What can we do?

Nell: Poppy is the obvious answer.

Me: Scones, or swords?

Nell: I was thinking more of self defence. Poppy is a black belt. She could hold a class like Gladys. Our Penguin can film her and put it online.

Me: Good idea. Manuel could be her guinea pig.

Nell: It’s not guinea pig, it’s guinea pug and we’ve had enough of those with Babycakes Gillespie. We shall all take part. Including you.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: All I can say is two pairs of socks, a hat and a scarf.

Me: I told you it was chilly outside this morning. It is November you know.

Nell: No. That’s what Manuel knitted while he was listening to the Evening Story.

Me: Gosh. He’s wasted as a waiter.

Nell: Knitwear Wolf and The Cat agree. They want him on their team.

Me: What team? Football? He would be ever so good in goal.

Nell: I’m not talking about sport, although you should see the way he plays table tennis. Timothy didn’t have a chance.

Me: I didn’t know Timothy played. Shouldn’t he be on retreat? This isn’t a safe time for turkeys.

Nell: Nobody is getting near Timothy. Don’t you worry.

Me: Good.

Nell: Now, where was I?

Me: Talking about teams.

Nell: Oh yes. Manuel is going to join the knitting team.

Me: That’s an excellent idea.

Nell: There have been so many orders in the lead up to Christmas that the timing couldn’t be better.

Me: I hope people buy our book as a Christmas present.

Nell: I’m sure they will. It’s the perfect present. An antidote to all the gloom in the world at the moment.

Me: Thank you. That’s what I am hoping.

Nell: And they aren’t just any old Conversations, you know. They’re with me.

Me: You’re right.

Nell: We just have to ask everyone to spread the word.

Me: Yes. I’m sure they will.

Nell: Did you hear that?

Me: No. What?

Nell: A Beefy just yodelled.

Me: Surely not.

Nell: It’s doing it again. Well, that’s the limit.

Me: I love yodelling. It reminds me of The Alps.

Nell: This is Devon, not the ‘Sound of Music’. The cows will be wearing bells next.

Me: I’d rather like that. Sorry.

Me: Harriet is an autumn coloured dog.

Nell: Yes, I suppose she is.

Me: Knitwear Wolf is the same.

Nell: Rupert is not a dog.

Me: No, but he’s autumnal in his colours, although he has something of the winter about him. Maybe it’s the Canadian thing.

Nell: Well, all I can say is that my reading group become quite giggly when he joins us on a zoom call.

Me: Is Knitwear Wolf in your reading group?

Nell: Only occasionally. He’s a keen reader. You must have seen him reading by the fire.

Me: Yes. I love his glasses.

Nell: Talking of glasses, I think Poppy might be needing them soon.

Me: Why?

Nell: She put sugar in the scrambled eggs this morning. Thought it was salt.

Me: Oh no.

Nell: David still managed to eat it before Manuel could whisk it away.

Me: How is Manuel?

Nell: Most surprising.

Me: Why?

Nell: Have you ever seen an octopus knit?

Me: No. I must confess I haven’t.

Nell: Manuel knits. I came into the living room last night and there he was. Listening to Rupert reading a bedtime story and knitting away. Didn’t understand a word, of course. But never mind.

Me: I didn’t know Rupert read bedtime stories.

Nell: Yes. Every evening since the nights have started drawing in. We all sit around the fire. The puppies love it. In fact most of us do, to be honest.

Me: I thought you were having Evening Thoughts.

Nell: Thoughts are only for the morning. Evenings are for unwinding, not over thinking.

Me: Do you think I could join you?

Nell: Of course. You can share your chair with David.

Me: Don’t I get my own chair?

Nell: Certainly not. Story time is cuddling time. Everyone knows that.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: You are such a beautiful dog, Nell.

Nell: Thank you.

Me: I’m so lucky to have you in my life.

Nell: Do you want something?

Me: No.

Nell: Only David ate the last of the bacon, so we are going to have to wait for the next delivery.

Me: I don’t want bacon. I’ll make do with a boiled egg.

Nell: I’m not sure there are any eggs left either. The larger animals decided to make omelettes for breakfast.

Me: Themselves?

Nell: Yes. The mess was unbelievable. Poppy was furious and chased them out of the kitchen with her sword.

Me: Oh dear. Did they manage to finish their omelettes?

Nell: That’s not the point.

Me: I’ll just have a piece of toast then.

Nell: If there’s any bread left. David made sandwiches.

Me: There must be cereal.

Nell: Ask Malcolm. He was at the pool with Princess and Manuel the last time I saw him.

Me: How is Manuel settling in?

Nell: Extremely well. Fortunately Malcolm speaks a little Spanish and Princess can sign with her flippers.

Me: So is he really from Barcelona?

Nell: Yes. But he was working in Torquay as a waiter in a hotel run by a rather hysterical Lurcher.

Me: So how did he get here?

Nell: He was enjoying a morning swim when a Beefy scooped him up, flew him here and dropped him.

Me: That must have been a shock.

Nell: It was, but now he’s here, he doesn’t want to leave.

Me: Can’t he stay then, Nell? His waiting skills might be rather useful.

Nell: Never mind his waiting skills. You should see how quickly he tidied up the kitchen.

Me: So the Beefies did us a favour, if you ink about it.

Nell: Good grief.

Me: Just squidding. Sorry.

Me: That was an emotional moment. I must confess I had tears in my eyes.

Nell: Yes, it was wonderful.

Me: Seeing Tony and Dave reunited again.

Nell: They were so happy to see each other.

Me: Tony is still not well, though.

Nell: No. I told him he should go straight home as soon as he feels tired.

Me: Yes, he said he would and the Royal Mail are making sure he doesn’t have to do too much.

Nell: Good.

Me: He wanted me to thank everyone for their kind messages. They really meant a lot to him.

Nell: Yes, it’s always good to know that people care. He shouldn’t be back at work yet.

Me: The trouble is Tony loves people and he was missing everyone.

Nell: I understand.

Me: Yes. I think we all know how that feels, Nell.

Nell: Now, today is an extremely important one for our friends in the United States.

Me: Yes. I noticed Babycakes Gillespie was outside with his cart. Is Dave helping him?

Nell: Yes. Poppy agreed that bagels can be served today. I might try one later.

Me: I think Dave’s tried a few already.

Nell: You may have noticed that David and Babycakes are wearing hard hats.

Me: I did.

Nell: I’m afraid there was a Beefy attack first thing this morning.

Me: Mackerel?

Nell: Yes, and an octopus, would you believe?

Me: Where did they get that from?

Nell: I have no idea, but the poor thing was terrified.

Me: Is it still alive then?

Nell: Yes, didn’t you notice him resting in Princess’s pool?

Me: No, but I’m glad you warned me.

Nell: He’s called Manuel, by the way, and has lovely manners.

Me: Is he from Barcelona?

Nell: I don’t know. Why?

Me: No reason. Sorry.

Me: What lovely photos of Marv and Rhubarb.

Nell: Yes. Marvin is part of my WoofsApp group for young dogs, as you know, and he shared the photos on there.

Me: It’s lovely to see them getting along so well.

Nell: Yes. Marvin went on a 17k hike with Chris and Shannon and their friends and he and Rhubarb bonded.

Me: I wish they didn’t live so far away, Nell. I was going to fly over to Canada this summer.

Nell: There is always next summer. Canada isn’t going anywhere you know.

Me: True.

Nell: And you know Chris will be on the first plane over to see you as soon as it is safe for him to do so, and so will Alice and the children.

Me: Yes. You’re right.

Nell: In the meantime, enjoy the fact that the sun is actually shining today and Glide with Gladys can take place outside.

Me: Where are the llamas?

Nell: There was an unfortunate incident involving spontaneous spitting, so Gladys was forced to ban them from today’s session.

Me: What happened?

Nell: One of the Salcombe Setters suggested that pyjamas weren’t suitable attire for sporting activities and the llamas reacted badly.

Me: I don’t blame them. It was a very personal remark.

Nell: I’m afraid Setters tends to stick their noses in other people’s business. Fortunately they were outside, so no harm was done.

Me: Good.

Nell: A quick roll in the grass and her coat was clean. No need for such a fuss.

Me: What is Gladys going to do about her classes during lockdown?

Nell: Our Penguin will film them and upload them on to YouChewed. No guests of course.

Me: Not even the llamas?

Nell: The llamas aren’t guests. They’re essential dancers. Do keep up.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: Lovely photos of Tony, but Dave looks rather serious.

Nell: Sundays are about caring and family, as you know, and at Morning Thoughts today we discussed Tony. David thinks you should tell everyone what’s been going on.

Me: Well, two weeks ago we heard that Tony had caught COVID19. It was an awful shock.

Nell: Yes. David was inconsolable.

Me: He even refused a bacon sandwich.

Nell: You were in contact with his wife, Sue, every day so we could stay updated.

Me: Yes, Tony has been very unwell but now he is finally on the mend and even talking about coming back to work.

Nell: Which is a ridiculous idea and I shall tell him precisely that, when I next see him.

Me: I think you’re just going to run into his arms like you always do.

Nell: Probably. Anyway, the thing is that sometimes the world can seem a dark place.

Me: It certainly can.

Nell: People will be struggling with the latest news of a national lockdown.

Me: Yes.

Nell: But this is our chance to show we care. We can make a difference. It’s like a power cut. What do you do when the lights go out?

Me: Panic?

Nell: No. You light a candle. And that’s what we should do in these dark times.

Me: Do you mean put a light in the window to show we’re thinking of others?

Nell: Yes, and be that light in the darkness.

Me: How?

Nell: Pick up your iBone and call someone, or chat to them on FaceTime, or Zoom. Or text them on WoofsApp. Just let them know you are there and they’re not alone.

Me: Yes.

Nell: We will get through this together.

Me: We will.

Nell: You and Me. Always. Remember?

Me: Yes. Sorry.