Completely unacceptable

Me: Have you seen Dave?

Nell: Yes. He’s downstairs playing ‘Cheeky Animal’ with Poppy.

Me: Is he winning?

Nell: No. He’s hopeless. He tries to hide behind his paw but it’s obvious he’s sticking his tongue out.

Me: Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy. I’m surprised Poppy has time to play.

Nell: Malcolm prepared breakfast today with help from young Benjamin Seagull. Pancakes.

Me: I love my pancakes with maple syrup.

Nell: There was bacon on the side for David, of course, and those who wanted it.

Me: That’s why he’s in a good mood.

Nell: Now, you know tomorrow is Halloween?

Me: Yes. It’s going to be a strange one this year.

Nell: No trick or treating in the wider community but fine to celebrate within our bubble.

Me: We must have the largest bubble ever seen.

Nell: But it’s all animals. Gladys and the Llamas will be performing. I’m afraid they’re a little overexcited.

Me: I thought I saw them cartwheeling earlier.

Nell: I wish they wouldn’t do that. Fancy dress is compulsory. Pop over to the Big House if you need a costume, but do it soon as The Cat is expecting the Whippets Institute at 11.

Me: They love Halloween, don’t they?

Nell: To be honest I think we could all do with a little fun in our lives at the moment.

Me: We certainly could. By the way, Chloe says you are doing so well with your hydrotherapy that you only need to go every 3 weeks now.

Nell: That’s good to hear.

Me: Your weight has stayed the same, however. So you might have to have salad tomorrow instead of a hot dog.

Nell: Excuse me? Halloween without a hot dog is like a scone with no jam and cream. Completely unacceptable.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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