Me: Look at my darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy watching over you.
Nell: David has grown into an extremely loving young Labrador. Would you like to hear how it went with PC Panda?
Me: Yes, please.
Nell: I must confess I was a little nervous. Poppy had laid on an excellent tea, however. Finger sandwiches, crusts off, of course. Egg, tomato and cucumber as pandas are vegetarian.
Me: Lovely.
Nell: David had a plate of his own ham sandwiches in the kitchen to avoid any mistakes.
Me: Good thinking.
Nell: I’m not sure the Chinese costumes were necessary but The Cat insisted.
Me: Did PC Panda like them?
Nell: He’s Devon born and bred so I think he found them a little odd. He asked me if we were going to a fancy dress party later.
Me: Oh well.
Nell: Malcolm made some lovely little cakes but the highlight was most definitely Poppy’s scones. Fresh out of the oven with homemade strawberry jam and oodles of clotted cream.
Me: Yummy.
Nell: I apologised profusely for getting Armando’s name wrong and he said not to worry. In fact things were going extremely well until that wretched pug arrived.
Me: Oh no.
Nell: Yes. He waltzed in without so much as a by your leave and said ‘Hi there, Mandy Pandy’.
Me: How shocking.
Nell: Yes. PC Panda was having none of it. He wiped his paws carefully and said ‘Nobody calls me Mandy except for my closest friends and you, Sir, are not one of them.’
Me: What did Babycakes do?
Nell: He left. I said, ‘I’m so sorry for the disturbance PC Panda’ and then he winked and said, ‘The name’s Mandy’ and finished his scone.
Me: Good old Mandy Pandy.
Nell: Just Mandy. Don’t push it.
Me: Yes. Sorry.
