After the class

Me: Why are you giving me that look?

Nell: I’m resting.

Me: Poppy says the Anger Management class was great fun.

Nell: Have you talked to Malcolm?

Me: No. He didn’t come down to breakfast this morning.

Nell: He’s probably completely exhausted.

Me: But I thought it went well. What happened?

Nell: Knitwear Wolf dropped them off at the venue and they went inside. Malcolm said he felt uneasy at once because it was full of angry animals.

Me: I wouldn’t like that either.

Nell: Poppy loved it. She told Malcolm the place had ‘a great vibe.’ Her words. She was really fired up.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: When the mediator came out Poppy recognised him immediately from her yoga class.

Me: Was he a Beefy?

Nell: No. Beefies don’t do yoga. It was AJ the gardening Afghan’s cousin, Peter.

Me: Peter the Afghan doesn’t sound right.

Nell: Well, that’s his name. He wears his hair in a pony tail and calls everyone ‘My friend.’

Me: How welcoming.

Nell: Malcolm liked him immediately.

Me: I bet he did.

Nell: Unfortunately nobody else did.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: He asked them all to introduce themselves so Poppy jumped on the table and shouted ‘I’m Poppy Martin. Anyone got a problem with that?’

Me: Had anyone?

Nell: No, they all cheered, so she said ‘I’m here because I whacked a Beefy and I’m not sorry.’

Me: She isn’t.

Nell: Everyone applauded, especially Babycakes Gillespie.

Me: Babycakes Gillespie?

Nell: Yes, the gangster pug from Plymouth. Wears pinstriped suits and smokes cigars.

Me: Are you winding me up?

Nell: Certainly not. Anyway, Babycakes took a shine to Malcolm. He’s invited him over to dinner.

Me: That’s kind.

Nell: Malcolm can’t have dinner with a gangster. He’s not that kind of flamingo.

Me: No. Sorry.

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