Look who’s back

Me: Was that Dave I heard singing this morning?

Nell: Yes. David is practising sea shanties. He’s still hoping to join Tony’s crew.

Me: Wasn’t it lovely to see those two reunited again? He missed Tony so much while he was away on holiday.

Nell: I know. I’m afraid David doesn’t have any concept of time. As far as he’s concerned Tony has been away for weeks and weeks.

Me: You’re all a bit like that, Nell. You get over excited when Kev comes back from the studio.

Nell: That is just Showing Appreciation. It’s one of our greatest skills. There is nothing worse than a Disinterested Dog.

Me: I can’t even imagine it. I don’t think I’ve ever met one.

Nell: It’s rare to see. I once knew a Lapsang Souchong who was dreadfully aloof but in the main it is something one only finds in cats.

Me: Don’t you mean Lhasa Apso? Lapsang Souchong is a type of tea.

Nell: Maybe I do. Anyway, it had something of a cat about it.

Me: Talking of cats why is The Cat walking around in thigh boots and a feathered hat?

Nell: It’s these wretched Pirate Wars.

Me: Pirate Wars?

Nell: Stephen Seagull started it and now everyone seems to be joining in.

Me: Did I see Henry wearing an eye patch?

Nell: Probably. He and Horst have been riding around in David’s hat behaving badly.

Me: Well, I’m delighted to see Knitwear Wolf joining in.

Nell: I’m surprised at Rupert. He sat down to breakfast this morning in a loose white shirt, breeches and a long curly wig.

Me: He’s just letting his hair down, Nell.

Nell: Very funny.

Me: Have you heard any good pirate jokes lately?

Nell: No.

Me: Neither have ayyyye.

Nell; Good grief.

Me: Sorry.

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