Me: Was that Dave I heard singing this morning?
Nell: Yes. David is practising sea shanties. He’s still hoping to join Tony’s crew.
Me: Wasn’t it lovely to see those two reunited again? He missed Tony so much while he was away on holiday.
Nell: I know. I’m afraid David doesn’t have any concept of time. As far as he’s concerned Tony has been away for weeks and weeks.
Me: You’re all a bit like that, Nell. You get over excited when Kev comes back from the studio.
Nell: That is just Showing Appreciation. It’s one of our greatest skills. There is nothing worse than a Disinterested Dog.
Me: I can’t even imagine it. I don’t think I’ve ever met one.
Nell: It’s rare to see. I once knew a Lapsang Souchong who was dreadfully aloof but in the main it is something one only finds in cats.
Me: Don’t you mean Lhasa Apso? Lapsang Souchong is a type of tea.
Nell: Maybe I do. Anyway, it had something of a cat about it.
Me: Talking of cats why is The Cat walking around in thigh boots and a feathered hat?
Nell: It’s these wretched Pirate Wars.
Me: Pirate Wars?
Nell: Stephen Seagull started it and now everyone seems to be joining in.
Me: Did I see Henry wearing an eye patch?
Nell: Probably. He and Horst have been riding around in David’s hat behaving badly.
Me: Well, I’m delighted to see Knitwear Wolf joining in.
Nell: I’m surprised at Rupert. He sat down to breakfast this morning in a loose white shirt, breeches and a long curly wig.
Me: He’s just letting his hair down, Nell.
Nell: Very funny.
Me: Have you heard any good pirate jokes lately?
Nell: No.
Me: Neither have ayyyye.
Nell; Good grief.
Me: Sorry.
