Nell: You are not going to believe this.

Me: I just might.

Nell: The Daily Growl have published some of the other dogs shortlisted for Handsome Hound 2020.

Me: It’s Naughty Nigel and Cousin Boo.

Nell: Yes, that’s fair enough, but look at the third one.

Me: It’s Dog Marley.

Nell: I know it’s Dog Marley, but seriously?

Me: Dog Marley is probably a wild card. It’s an interesting choice, though.

Nell: Wild is the word. That animal needs his hair brushing.

Me: Dave is up against some stiff competition, isn’t he? Naughty Nigel is very good looking and so is Boo.

Nell: Yes, but I have every confidence in David. He has both charm and good looks.

Me: My Big Brave Beautiful Boy. We decided on Photo 1, didn’t we?

Nell: Yes. 2 came a close second.

Me: I think it’s just the distraction we need.

Nell: I’ll tell you what I don’t need, being woken up by a large sea creature in a blonde wig singing ‘Dorado are a seal’s best friend.’

Me: Aren’t Dorado golden fish?

Nell: Yes, but that’s not the point.

Me: Princess certainly enjoys attention.

Nell: I noticed.

Me: Everyone loves her, Nell. Even the Beefies.

Nell: Yes. They keep throwing mackerel at her and screaming. It’s like The Beatles in the sixties.

Me: It is.

Nell: Talk about over the top. She makes Gladys look reserved.

Me: The Cat adores her.

Nell: Well, they share a love of sequins and fish. I blame Our Penguin.

Me: You mustn’t. Our Penguin heard you were looking for a Royal Seal and was just trying to help.

Nell: There is nothing Royal about Princess, apart from her name.

Me: But she makes Mutley smile.

Nell: Yes, that is exactly why she’s staying.

Me: Of course. Sorry.

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