Nell: We have come to the decision that Malcolm is not himself.
Me: I could have told you that.
Nell: Fortunately both Jonathan and Faye have agreed to help us in our investigations.
Me: I’m very pleased to hear that.
Nell: I saw Harriet whispering to them during Morning Thoughts, although it could have been to Henry and Horst, of course. Those boys are so good at concealment I am never quite sure where they are.
Me: David seemed to be taking a keen interest in Jonathan’s breakfast.
Nell: He says the amount of vegetables and fruit Jonathan eats is quite worrying but a few more bacon sandwiches might help.
Me: Did I see Poppy talking to Faye?
Nell: Yes. She was telling her about Malcolm’s latest bad behaviour.
Me: What has he done now?
Nell: He threw a wet mackerel at the Welsh corgi choir during Sunday Singing.
Me: No? That’s Beefy behaviour.
Nell: Quite. And Joyce is fairly sure she heard him talking in Swedish to the filming penguin.
Me: They were probably discussing meatballs.
Nell: I know Malcolm is not himself but I don’t think he has reached the stage of discussing meatballs with a penguin yet.
Me: But everyone loves the Swedish ones.
Nell: Have you seen Knitwear Wolf? He’s late with the newspapers.
Me: No.
Nell: It’s this awful rain. It plays havoc with his cardigans.
Me: What time is Count Bingo arriving?
Nell: Any minute now. He had an early meeting with Owl Pacino and the Royal Owl Force.
Me: Why?
Nell: A precautionary measure. If the bad behaviour spreads we will need to move fast. As I always say: ‘A rolling bone gathers no moss.’
Me: Don’t you mean stone? Why would you roll a bone?
Nell: Why wouldn’t you?
Me: Yes. Sorry.
