Dave is defiant

Nell: You won’t believe this.

Me: I just might.

Nell: There was a tiny dachshund puppy in the bag.

Me: No?

Nell: Yes. His name is Frank and he wants to meet The Queen.

Me: So my Big Brave Beautiful Boy decided to make his dream come true?

Nell: David cannot go around stealing puppies.

Me: But Frankie wanted to come here.

Nell: Don’t start calling him Frankie. I know where that will end.

Me: It still wasn’t kidnapping. Dave would never do that.

Nell: I have to tell you that David is not at all sorry and is being completely defiant. In fact he seems rather proud of himself.

Me: Surely not.

Nell: And every time I tell Frank he has to go home he just smiles and eats another piece of bacon.

Me: Is there bacon then?

Nell: Of course there is bacon. Emergency situations demand bacon sandwiches and cups of tea. Everyone knows that.

Me: I think Frankie should be allowed to visit The Queen.

Nell: I knew you would say that.

Me: I noticed he is wearing a coat.

Nell: He’s a puppy. Do you want him to freeze?

Me: No, I just wondered where it came from.

Nell: The new Pupwear line.

Me: Do we know how David found him?

Nell: Not yet but we soon will. Charlie is talking to them both now. Mutley is sitting in on proceedings and Joyce is taking notes.

Me: Joyce? What she’s got to do with it?

Nell: Mutley can’t hear, so Joyce is being his ears.

Me: I’m not sure about that, Nell. She isn’t coming to the Palace, is she?

Nell: Of course she is. You don’t think we would let that wretched peacock come along and not Joyce, do you?

Me: Of course not. Sorry.

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