Have you seen her Ted Talk?

Me: Where are the girls?

Nell: In your bedroom with David. Poppy is consoling Harriet and Gladys is in my handbag.

Me: Why?

Nell: Because David brought it upstairs. You know he likes carrying it around and Gladys has started sleeping in it again since the weather got colder.

Me: I mean why does Harriet need consoling?

Nell: Harriet says Jim has a wandering eye.

Me: Jim the Farm Dog?

Nell: Of course.

Me: He is completely devoted to Harriet. She knows he is.

Nell: Well, apparently he woofed at a passing Golden.

Me: Retriever?

Nell: Yes.

Me: With beautiful long blonde hair?

Nell: Exactly. Like Sally.

Me: Maybe it was Sally and he was just saying hello?

Nell: But Sally is in London.

Me: But is she? Sally is a spy.

Nell: I hadn’t thought of that. Charlie will know.

Me: Surely Dave should know. He is her boyfriend.

Nell: When it comes to spying she tries to protect David as much as she can. He wears his heart on his face.

Me: You mean sleeve.

Nell: I do not. David isn’t wearing sleeves and if he was why would he do that? Ridiculous idea.

Me: Yes, it is when you say it like that. It comes from Shakespeare’s ‘Othello’. If you wear your heart on your sleeve birds will peck at it.

Nell: Well, that’s not happening. The Beefies would have his heart in an instant.

Me: True.

Nell: Anyway, now Harriet thinks she needs to change.

Me: But she doesn’t. She’s perfect as she is. Apart from the cushion chewing.

Nell: That’s what Poppy says. Haven’t you seen her Ted Talk on You Chewed? She is an excellent motivational speaker.

Me: Go Poppy. Girl power.

Nell: Do stop. You are not a Spice Girl.

Me: No. Sorry.

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