Me: Why is Dave cuddling Mutley?
Nell: David is feeling Left Out. Mutley is just feeling tired.
Me: Do you mean left out of Knitwear Wolf’s gang of thieves because that might actually be a good thing?
Nell: Yes. According to Harriet, David needs to be protected.
Me: Dear Brave Beautiful Boy.
Nell: They are unrepentant by the way. Especially Harriet. She says it is for the greater good.
Me: Maybe it is. So was it them who sheared the sheep?
Nell: No. Jim and the Farm Dogs did the shearing.
Me: But why Bert?
Nell: They knew Bert would be sleepy after his usual cider or two and he needed a good haircut.
Me: Fair enough. Although the pan pipes and the dancing were a bit unnecessary, weren’t they?
Nell: They wanted the publicity.
Me: They did? Why?
Nell: That’s what I said. In fact I think I may have even raised my voice at that point.
Me: I don’t blame you.
Nell: And then I heard someone say ‘If you want to catch a fish you need to bait it’ and in he walked.
Me: Who?
Nell: Knitwear Wolf in a cardigan.
Me: Nobody walks in to a Family Meeting.
Nell: Not unless they are invited.
Me: And was he?
Nell: Yes. By Charlie.
Me: Charlie?
Nell: I didn’t know that at the time of course so I was furious.
Me: I bet you were.
Nell: He looked round the room as cool as a Collie.
Me: You mean cucumber.
Nell: I do not. He spotted Harriet, winked and said ‘Hello, Princess.’
Me: What did Harriet say?
Nell: I’d love to tell you but I’ll be late for my Pilates class.
Me: You can’t do this to me.
Nell: I am never late for Pilates.
Me: No. Sorry.
