Utter nonsense, or is it?

Me: Why is Kev laughing with Dave?

Nell: He just read Doug the Pug’s interview with Bert the shorn sheep.

Me: Was it good?

Nell: It’s complete and utter nonsense.

Me: What on earth did he say?

Nell: Do you want me to read it to you?

Me: Yes.

Nell: ‘As I was settling down for an evening snooze I heard beautiful fairy music coming across the field.’

Me: BBC Introducing play some strange stuff in the evenings.

Nell: No. It wasn’t the radio. Shall I continue?

Me: Yes.

Nell: ‘I looked up and saw it was pan pipes played by a magical curly haired camel with no humps.’

Me: Of course it was.

Nell: Wait until you hear the next part.

Me: There’s more?

Nell: This is just the beginning. Where was I?

Me: Pan pipes and a humpless camel.

Nell: ‘Then a tall hairy gentleman in a green dress started singing while a long haired fairy tale creature began to dance.’

Me: Not something you see every day.

Nell: ‘I was transfixed.’

Me: I don’t blame him.

Nell: ‘Suddenly a beautiful princess appeared with conker brown hair and gentle eyes. She told me to go to sleep and all would be well.’

Me: Did he go to sleep?

Nell: Yes. He was awfully tired by then.

Me: I’m not surprised.

Nell: ‘When I woke up I had lost my fleece.’

Me: Poor Bert. Was he devastated?

Nell: No. He says ‘The funny thing is that it’s the best cut I’ve had in a long while.’

Me: This is going to sound strange but I feel like I’ve seen those creatures before.

Nell: Don’t be silly. The sheep was obviously drugged.

Me: But it was a happy haircut by kind creatures.

Nell: Just listen to yourself.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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