Nell: Sometimes men simply don’t listen.
Me: What do you mean?
Nell: Kev and I were on the beach yesterday and I was explaining something really important and he turned and watched the speedboats.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: You wouldn’t have done that. For all your faults, and we know you have many, you do listen.
Me: Thank you. I think.
Nell: Harriet is a good listener too. David is not. Halfway through a conversation he just gets up and leaves and Mutley simply falls asleep.
Me: What about Poppy?
Nell: Poppy has her paws in both camps. It completely depends on her mood. Give her a glass of wine on a summer’s evening and she can listen for hours but early morning before she’s had her coffee, don’t bother.
Me: I think a lot of people are like that.
Nell: Now Herr Schaeferhund is a wonderful listener.
Me: Is he?
Nell: He never talks of himself. He only wants to know about me. What I think, where I am going, who I am seeing.
Me: Actually Nell, he sounds a bit nosey.
Nell: You see. You simply can’t be happy for me. Kev is the same. When he finally listened he said Herr Schaeferhund sounds dodgy.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: Dodgy! I mean a gentleman dog shows interest in me and he is suddenly dodgy.
Me: I’m sure he is lovely and you are fascinating. It’s just people don’t usually just listen. They like to tell you things too.
Nell: I can’t believe you are giving me advice but if it will put your mind at rest I will try and find out a little more about Herr Schaeferhund.
Nell: I don’t want you snooping when he visits us later. I know what you are like.
Me: Yes. Sorry.