Nell: Well, Harriet and I could have saved ourselves hours of research.

Me: Why?

Nell: We’ve been scouring the internet trying to find out what the Black Bowl means.

Me: The one the short sighted pug with a very small monkey on its shoulder gave Bones?

Nell: Of course. How many elderly pugs do you think there are walking around Dartmouth with very small monkeys on their shoulders? We don’t know if it was short sighted, by the way. It just needed glasses.

Me: True.

Nell: Anyway, Poppy came in with our elevenses, glanced at the drawing of the Black Bowl and said: “Ah, I see Bones is a traitor.”

Me: How did she know?

Nell: From her time as a cook on a pirate ship. Do keep up.

Me: Gosh!

Nell: Anyway, according to pirate code Bones has betrayed someone.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: I just hope David isn’t at risk.

Me: So do I? Where is he, by the way?

Nell: He’s gone with Kev and Alice to get Jonathan a wetsuit.

Me: So, Dave’s not grounded anymore?

Nell: No, you can’t ground a young animal for long in this weather. Not when family are visiting. You should know that.

Me: Yes, sorry.

Me: Why is Dave sulking?

Nell: He has been grounded.

Me: What happened?

Nell: Have you seen today’s Daily Growl?

Me: No.

Nell: David has made the front page.

Me: What has he done?

Nell: He caused a scene at the Admiral Inn in Dartmouth yesterday. Here, read the paper.

Me: “Dog about Town, Dave Martin, and his sidekick, Beagle Bones, entertained holidaymakers yesterday with their singing and dancing. Chairs were overturned and tables were broken.” Oh dear.

Nell: Look who is in the background. The Cat. Wearing feathers.

Me: “When asked about the damage caused, Dave Martin replied: “We were just having fun.”

Nell: Well, David is facing the music alone because Beagle Bones has left town.

Me: Why?

Nell: Apparently after all the kerfuffle David and Bones were enjoying a drink when an elderly pug wearing thick glasses carrying a white stick came in and gave Bones a letter

Me: Excuse me?

Nell: Bones opened the letter. Turned white, which is actually quite difficult for a Beagle, and ran off.

Me: What was in the letter?

Nell: A black bowl.

Me: A black bowl?

Nell: Yes.

Me: How did it get in the letter?

Nell: Not a real one. A drawing of one. Do keep up.

Me: And that frightened Bones so much he ran away?

Nell: Yes. I don’t know why but I mean to find out.

Me: Sherlock Martin strikes again.

Nell: Don’t be silly. Tell Poppy, Jonathan likes his eggs soft boiled, please and ask David to come here as I need a word with him immediately.

Me: Yes, sorry.

Nell: What is Jonathan doing?

Me: He and Seamus were searching for Petunia. She needed to go to bed.

Nell: Was she a guest of your sister’s too?

Me: No, she lives there.

Nell: When are you all coming home?

Me: We should be back by the afternoon. Any news?

Nell: Mutley managed to ward off Barker King but now he is having issues with his hypermarket.

Me: I didn’t know he had one.

Nell: Walbark. You might have heard of it. Anyway, apparently he told the shareholders he was sorry but Jonathan was visiting and he needed to get home. He has his priorities right.

Me: Yes.

Nell: David has a new friend in Dartmouth. A young Beagle by the name of Bones. Harriet says he is trouble and a bad influence.

Me: Is she okay?

Nell: Yes, she and Jim have gone to the beach. Oh, the big news is John proposed to Poppy.

Me: No!

Nell: Yes, but she turned him down. Said she wasn’t ready.

Me: Is he awfully disappointed?

Nell: He says he is prepared to wait. Did Jonathan find Petunia?

Me: Eventually. She was under the shed. She refused to come out. Alice poked her with a stick. We had to leave her there overnight.

Nell: I’m not sure that is the way to treat guests.

Me: Petunia is a chicken.

Nell: You could have mentioned that before. Just drive home now, please. We miss you.

Me: Yes. Sorry.