Nell: I’m not sure Harriet is completely focused.
Me: What do you mean?
Nell: She’s supposed to be watching the Bus Stop but she keeps looking at her paws, or family photos.
Me: I do that. The digital photo frame is fascinating.
Nell: It’s not a problem at the moment because Beauregard is out there waiting for a bus.
Me: Beauregard the tiger?
Nell: Do you know any other Beauregards?
Me: Waiting for a bus?
Nell: Yes.
Me: Are they going to let a tiger get on a bus? I know they allow dogs but I’m not sure they allow tigers.
Nell: He’s not really waiting. He’s pretending to wait.
Me: What’s the difference?
Nell: When it arrives he’ll shrug his shoulders as if to say it’s the wrong bus.
Me: But there’s only one bus.
Nell: Stop nitpicking.
Me: And why is he pretending to wait for a bus? Rupert isn’t going to be on it.
Nell: He wants to eavesdrop on village talk in case someone gives something away about Rupert’s whereabouts.
Me: They aren’t going to do that with a tiger listening.
Nell: You don’t know that. He’s going to act nonchalant.
Me: Are you sure he doesn’t just want to eat the spaghetti bolognese?
Nell: There isn’t any spaghetti bolognese.
Me: Yes, there is. I saw Stanley drop it off in a Tupperware container first thing this morning.
Nell: Well, it isn’t there now.
Me: Someone must have collected it, or Beauregard’s eaten it.
Nell: But he’s not a member of the Spaghetti Bolognese Club.
Me: Tigers don’t care about things like membership and clubs. If there’s something tasty they’ll eat it.
Nell: Did it have a label?
Me: I think so.
Nell: Why are you only telling me this now?
Me: You didn’t ask. Sorry.
