Me: I admire Nigel’s dedication to Bus Stop Monitoring but it’s Saturday and the children aren’t going to school.
Nell: It’s always best to be prepared.
Me: For what?
Nell: Any Eventualities.
Me: Like what?
Nell: A visiting red fox terrier lost his cap in the wind yesterday.
Me: Really?
Nell: Yes. If it wasn’t for our Bus Stop Monitoring it would never have been found.
Me: How far did it fly?
Nell: Right across the road and into a neighbour’s garden.
Me: How did you get it back?
Nell: Let’s just say it’s fortunate that llamas have long necks.
Me: I didn’t know the llamas were involved.
Nell: Llamas are always involved. In one way or another.
Me: Was the fox red terrier pleased?
Nell: Eventually.
Me: What do you mean?
Nell: I’m not sure he was expecting to see a llama.
Me: Lucky the lions weren’t out.
Nell: Lionel King was around, actually, but he decided to keep a low profile.
Me: Around?
Nell: He had come to see me about Christmas dinner, if you must know.
Me: I don’t want that lion here at Christmas, Nell.
Nell: Well, I’m afraid you’ve been outvoted.
Me: I didn’t know there was a vote.
Nell: I put it to the family and they said it was fine.
Me: They did?
Nell: Yes. The grandchildren are positively excited about it.
Me: They are?
Nell: It’s not every day you get to share Christmas dinner with a lion.
Me: There’s going to be an excess of lions and tigers.
Nell: Why?
Me: Mrs King and Roary are joining us and Dave said he and the Big Cat Vibe will be performing.
Nell: Have they cleared it with the committee?
Me: What committee?
Nell: The Christmas Committee. Do keep up.
Me: Right, Sorry.
