Me: Why is Nigel in the kitchen looking guilty?
Nell: You had better ask him.
Me: Does it involve bacon?
Nell: No.
Me: Or boiled eggs?
Nell: It’s not breakfast related.
Me: He looks guilty.
Nell: As well he might.
Me: You’re going to have to tell me.
Nell: I don’t know what my friend Dorothy is going to say about this.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: Oh dear, indeed.
Me: What happened?
Nell: Let’s just say Nigel caught the eye of another lady at the Easter Parade yesterday.
Me: He was looking awfully handsome.
Nell: That’s no excuse.
Me: The Cat must be ever so pleased Harriet won the price for Most Creative Bonnet.
Nell: It is delighted.
Me: Everyone seemed to love Dave. I’m fairly sure he will be elected as mayor as soon as the village decides it needs one.
Nell: Do you want to know about Nigel and his admirer, or not?
Me: I do.
Nell: It has come to my attention that Nigel was seen walking down the lane with said animal.
Me: Really?
Nell: They were also seen paddling together in the stream.
Me: Gosh.
Nell: And sharing a stolen Yorkshire pudding on the little bridge.
Me: With gravy?
Nell: Of course not.
Me: Just asking. We have plenty of leftovers, Nell. Nobody is going to miss a Yorkshire pudding.
Nell: That’s not the point. Nigel is supposed to be with Dorothy.
Me: They might not be exclusive. Things are far more relaxed nowadays.
Nell: Dorothy would never dream of sharing a Yorkshire pudding with another dog.
Me: You don’t know that. If it was offered to her nicely after a walk and a paddle she might not be able to resist?
Nell: The point is that Nigel is definitely Naughty again.
Me: Yes. Sorry.
