Me: Naughty Nigel winked at me.
Nell: And your problem is?
Me: I don’t know why he did it.
Nell: Does there have to be a reason?
Me: I suppose not.
Nell: Can’t an animal wink if it feels like doing so?
Me: It’s an unusual thing to do. I wondered if he and I were sharing a secret I didn’t know about.
Nell: Did you hear what you just said?
Me: Maybe he told me something I forgot?
Nell: Good grief.
Me: It happens occasionally, now I’m getting older.
Nell: If you must know, Nigel has been chosen by the Daily Growl as one of the judges for Our Devon Darling.
Me: Well, that’s good news for Harriet. He’s bound to vote for her.
Nell: Nigel is an undercover judge,
Me: What?
Nell: Nobody is supposed to know except for the other judges.
Me: Why do I know about him?
Nell: I just told you.
Me: So, Nigel shouldn’t really have winked at me?
Nell: No, he should not.
Me: At least that explains why we’re calling him Naughty Nigel again.
Nell: We’ve plenty of time. He’s here all week.
Me: Charlotte and Kerry need a holiday and Nigel is always welcome.
Nell: Unlike Nutkin and that awful chicken.
Me: You invited them to tea.
Nell: It might have been a mistake. The Cat is furious.
Me: It’s understandable. Lady C shouldn’t have pecked the flowers off its hat during Sunday Songs.
Nell: And Nutkin shouldn’t have eaten the nuts.
Me: I did wonder why The Cat had decorated its hat with real produce.
Nell: It was a celebration of autumn.
Me: Oh, I see. Now it makes sense. “Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness.’
Nell: Don’t start all that again. I’ve an afternoon tea to organise.
Me: Sorry.
