Me: Pinch, punch, first of the month.
Nell: Don’t start that again.
Me: You’re supposed to reply ‘White rabbits’.
Nell: Will Beefy in a Beanie do?
Me: No.
Nell: Or Bear in a Beanie?
Me: What are you talking about?
Nell: Haven’t you seen Herr Hoffmann and his best friend Sam?
Me: No.
Nell: Sam’s a singing Beefy.
Me: What?
Nell: And Herr Hoffmann’s thinking of joining him.
Me: Herr Hoffmann can’t be a singing Beefy.
Nell: No, he’s turning vegan. Sam’s even written a song about them winning.
Me: Winning what?
Nell: Best Bonnet. Would you like me to sing it?
Me: How do you know the song?
Nell: Because he’s been singing it since yesterday.
Me: Fair enough.
Nell: It has to be sung in an American accent. Don’t ask why.
Me: I won’t.
Nell: ‘My name is Seagull Sam.
And I’m a vegan, man.
My best friend Hoff, he’s a bear.
And with my golden eyes
On that special prize
I’m a gull who loves to care.
When it comes to a hat,
Don’t look at The Cat,
Or David, or Miss Harry Jet.
Just check out my Beanie
Cos you gotta believe me
It’s the finest one you’ve seen yet.
Hoff has one, too,
And I’m telling you,
One of us boys is the winner.
Now hand out the crown
So we can sit down
And enjoy a great vegan dinner.’
Me: Loved the accent.
Nell: Moving on, please share the link to the website where people can buy you a cup of Earl Grey. It’s the first of the month.
Me: Yes. It’s buymeacoffee.com/saramartin. We really appreciate your support. It makes a big difference.
Nell: It does.
Me: Are we really having a vegan dinner?
Nell: What day is it today?
Me: Of course. Sorry.
