Me: I thought you said Kev has to go into hiding?
Nell: He does.
Me: He’s in the kitchen buttering toast.
Nell: I know.
Me: And all you’re doing is watching him.
Nell: Not in an obvious way.
Me: In a really obvious way.
Me: I thought there was an urgency about this?
Nell: Let Kev enjoy his breakfast first.
Me: You haven’t told me where he’s going yet?
Nell: We’re still undecided. There’ve been some, quite frankly, ridiculous suggestions.
Me: What are they?
Nell: The llamas said he could pitch a tent in the field.
Me: That’s a bit too close to home.
Nell: And then Poppy suggested Dartmoor.
Me: That’s a good idea. Anyone can camp up there.
Nell: Not anymore and it’s far too cold. Kev’s 63. He’s not doing his Duke of Edinburgh award.
Me: What else?
Nell: David thinks the Burgh Hotel is the perfect place and Lionel has offered the use of his suite.
Me: Lionel has a suite at the Burgh Hotel? I thought he’d fallen on hard times.
Nell: He says he has contacts there.
Me: Why doesn’t he go then?
Nell: This is about Kev. Anyway, the Burgh Hotel is too predictable.
Me: What about the Cottage Hotel? Sarah and William are always pleased to see us.
Nell: The Cottage Hotel is closed in January.
Me: They might open for Kev. Are you reading the newspaper?
Nell: Did you know today is the Chinese New Year?
Me: Stop changing the subject.
Nell: It’s the end of the Year of the Tiger.
Me: Is it?
Nell: And the start of the Year of the Rabbit.
Me: If I find a giant stuffed rabbit in our living room I’m going to completely lose it.
Nell: Don’t be so dramatic.