Hats, Dogmanay and The Blubbery Wedding

Me: It’s finally Dogmanay. The last day of the year and the day of the Blubbery Wedding.

Nell: Thank goodness. I’ve had quite enough of this year, thank you.

Me: Would you mind if I mentioned the hats?

Nell: I’d rather you didn’t.

Me: They’re a bit eclectic.

Nell: You mean odd.

Me: I didn’t want to say that but they don’t seem to go together. Princess is in a tiara which is fair enough.

Nell: She borrowed it from Gladys.

Me: Dave and Kev are wearing top hats which is also standard for a wedding.

Nell: Not on the beach in the rain.

Me: Possibly not. You and Harriet seem a little unhappy with your hats, if I may say so.

Nell: They’re ghastly.

Me: I wouldn’t go that far.

Nell: Of course you wouldn’t. You’re wearing a beautiful fluffy all encasing hat.

Me: Yes, I’m rather relieved to be honest. And then there’s Poppy.

Nell: What about her?

Me: She’s wearing a pirate hat, Nell.

Nell: She refuses to wear anything else.

Me: It’s not very weddingy.

Nell: It goes with her sword.

Me: Does she really need a sword?

Nell: Someone has to cut the cake.

Me: Surely the bride and groom will do that.

Nell: They’ll be in the sea. They want the cake cut and thrown to the guests.

Me: Now that is unusual.

Nell: Not when it’s a fish cake made with whole mackerel.

Me: I might skip the cake. Who’s going on Lionel’s ship?

Nell: The Whippets Institute Big Band.

Me: What about the Welsh Corgi Choir?

Nell: They’ll be singing from a dinghy.

Me: I hope it can hold them all. They’re looking a little portlier than usual.

Nell: They’ve got life vests sewn into their dresses. Remember?

Me: Oh yes. Sorry.

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