Vegetables and Visitors

Me: Do you ever have trouble getting Dave to listen to you?

Nell: All the time. Why?

Me: I was talking to him about his favourite vegetables and he wasn’t really listening at all.

Nell: Of course he wasn’t.

Me: Poppy was listening, in the background and in a sort of bored and aloof way, but I know she was listening.

Nell: She’s good at that.

Me: What?

Nell: Not getting involved.

Me: I thought she might join in, being a chef, but she said nothing at all.

Nell: She was off duty. Was David carrying his Neon Green Chew?

Me: Yes, and he nearly had my eye out several times.

Nell: That thing is dangerous.

Me: I suggested all kinds of lovely vegetables.

Nell: David doesn’t like vegetables unless they’re roasted or served with gravy.

Me: You and Harriet love them. You eat them every day.

Nell: And? Roger Blubbery and Princess adore mackerel but you don’t see me eating the horrible stuff.

Me: Poppy loves fish.

Nell: We are all different and that’s perfectly fine. David is not a vegetable eating animal.

Me: I know. He’s more of a bacon boy.

Nell: Bacon boy?

Me: He listened when I mentioned cauliflower cheese, though.

Nell: Everyone loves cauliflower cheese.

Me: Maybe that’s what we should make for our visitors?

Nell: What visitors?

Me: So, the thing is.

Nell: Here we go.

Me: Naughty Nigel and Boo are coming for the weekend.

Nell: This weekend?

Me: Yes. Charlotte is dropping them off this afternoon.

Nell: What about the Kingsbridge Show?

Me: We’re going to that beforehand.

Nell: By ‘we’, you mean?

Me: You, me and Kev.

Nell: I see.

Me: Yes. You’re the Senior Labrador with special privileges.

Nell: Which include running potential visitors past me first.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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