Me: Dave really tried to stare at the view for longer this time.
Nell: Yes. For about thirty seconds.
Me: He stared at it with his whole self though.
Nell: What are you talking about?
Me: He had seriously focussed legs, Nell.
Nell: Here we go.
Me: A proper Big Boy stance. A Big Brave Beautiful Boy stance, to be exact.
Nell: David tried but he’s easily bored.
Me: Staring at a view isn’t everyone’s cup of tea.
Nell: Talking of tea, I think we should take a picnic the next time we go to the beach.
Me: Kev and I were saying the same thing.
Nell: Nothing too fancy. A few sandwiches, crusts off. Ham, cheese and tomato and egg.
Me: And cress.
Nell: Nobody wants a cress sandwich.
Me: I meant egg and cress.
Nell: I don’t like salad in a sandwich. It makes them soggy.
Me: You said cheese and tomato.
Nell: Tomatoes are different. Everyone enjoys a good tomato, preferably home grown.
Me: I’d like a tomato sandwich.
Nell: Well, have one then.
Me: We’ll need cake.
Nell: Yes. Sensible cake like lemon drizzle.
Me: Or cup cakes?
Nell: I think not.
Me: Or the odd scone?
Nell: Scones are not suitable for beach picnics. Sand and cream don’t mix and jam is too sticky.
Me: What about crisps?
Nell: One should never say no to a crisp.
Me: Did you know crisps are called chips in most countries?
Nell: We’re not having chips.
Me: And chips are fries, or French fries.
Nell: We’re still not getting any.
Me: Just saying.
Nell: We’ll need flasks of tea.
Me: Not Earl Grey. It has to be Builder’s.
Nell: I don’t drink Builder’s tea. Never have done. Never will. I shall take my own flask.
Me: Yes. Sorry.
