Nell: David’s top hat is perfect but I’m not at all sure about Harriet’s.
Me: Neither am I. The shape is all wrong on her. What was The Cat thinking?
Nell: I don’t know. It seemed rather distracted. Something about a lion in the orchard. Made no sense to me.
Me: Couldn’t Harriet wear her tiara?
Nell: Tiaras aren’t suitable for afternoon tea. Even with The Queen.
Me: I suppose not.
Nell: If we were having cocktails we might consider it.
Me: Maybe you are. The Queen might fancy a Cosmopolitan.
Nell: If The Queen was having anything it would be a small sherry. Richly deserved.
Me: She might want something different.
Nell: Nonsense. It will be delicate cups of Earl Grey tea accompanied by finger sandwiches, crusts off, scones, small iced cakes and perhaps a slice of Poppy’s cake if Her Majesty feels so inclined.
Me: What is Poppy’s cake?
Nell: No idea. She is keeping it a secret. It’s extremely large. That much I do know.
Me: Several tiers I expect.
Nell: Oceans of them from Gladys when she heard she isn’t coming with us.
Me: I was talking about layers of cake.
Nell: And I was talking about Gladys. Why bring cake into it?
Me: Never mind.
Nell: Why are you wearing a dress by the way? It’s Wednesday.
Me: It’s my Wednesday Writers’ Christmas Lunch.
Nell: That’s nice. Where are you going?
Me: The Cottage Hotel in Hope Cove.
Nell: Excellent. I’ll fetch my hat.
Me: I’m afraid it’s no dogs in the dining room.
Nell: I beg your pardon?
Me: I don’t make the rules.
Nell: So, I’m not allowed in the dining room but I am allowed to take tea with The Queen at Windsor Castle?
Me: Yes. It’s a funny old world. Sorry.
