Me: Where are you and Harriet?
Nell: In the field. What on earth are you wearing?
Me: Kev and I are in disguise.
Nell: Why?
Me: You said we could be part of the backup team.
Nell: Good grief. Just make sure Squawk doesn’t leave the house.
Me: Naughty Nigel, Boo and Seamus are here, too.
Nell: I know. They are aware and Nigel will use force if necessary.
Me: But what’s going on, Nell? An owl arrived first thing this morning and Dave and Gladys dashed off.
Nell: The owl was Tawny Tim. Owl Pacino sent him to let us know that a trickle of smoke was seen coming from a hut near the sea.
Me: Oh my goodness, Nell. What if Poppy is in danger?
Nell: Of course she is in danger. David has borrowed Knitwear Wolf’s motorbike so he should be there soon. Gladys is riding in the sidecar with Our Penguin.
Me: What’s Our Penguin doing there?
Nell: Filming of course. So we can see what’s happening.
Me: Why does Naughty Nigel need to use force?
Nell: Squawk is one of the Beefies. You don’t think he planned all this alone, do you?
Me: Do you mean we might be attacked?
Nell: Not as long as Squawk doesn’t know we know.
Me: Know what?
Nell: That he isn’t Terry. Wait, there’s a message from David on my iBone.
Me: What does it say?
Nell: ‘Definitely bacon. Approaching the barn cautiously.’
Me: Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.
Nell: Stay calm. David can do this. There’s another message.
Me: Tell me.
Nell: ‘Poppy is safe. Repeat. Poppy and Terry are safe.’
Me: Oh Nell. Thank goodness. I’m in tears.
Nell: No crying. Act normally until we get back and make sure Squawk doesn’t go anywhere.
Me: Yes. Sorry.