Me: Happy May Day.
Nell: Thank you.
Me: Why is Harriet hiding in the back garden?Is it a May Day game?
Nell: If you think we have time to play Hide and Bark at a time like this, then you are very much mistaken.
Me: I’ve never played Hide and Bark.
Nell: Obviously not.
Me: Why?
Nell: You have an unconvincing bark.
Me: Is it only for dogs, then?
Nell: No. Princess has an excellent bark but is poor at hiding.
Me: It’s difficult for a seal to hide. I can’t see Malcolm barking.
Nell: Nobody can see anyone barking. That’s the whole point. Anyway, Harriet is undercover.
Me: Why?
Nell: We’ve had a nasty incident with a rogue spider.
Me: Oh no.
Nell: Henry and Horst were doing their rounds with David when they got caught in its web.
Me: Dave got caught in a spider’s web? How big is the spider?
Nell: Not David. Henry and Horst. Horst managed to wriggle free but Henry is still stuck and the spider is refusing to release him.
Me: I don’t want to be mean but I think the spider is going to notice Harriet.
Nell: Harriet isn’t after the spider. We think The Hunter is behind this and has started turning the insects bad.
Me: I’m a bit frightened of spiders.
Nell: I can’t believe you just said that. They are the kindest of creatures.
Me: But they have long hairy legs.
Nell: I think there are a lot of people with long hairy legs during this lockdown so I would be very careful what you say.
Me: You know what I mean.
Nell: Well, you are wrong. Sidney has never behaved like this before.
Me: Sidney?
Nell: Stop distracting me. We need to free Henry.
Me: Yes. Sorry.