Happy May Day

Me: Happy May Day.

Nell: Thank you.

Me: Why is Harriet hiding in the back garden?Is it a May Day game?

Nell: If you think we have time to play Hide and Bark at a time like this, then you are very much mistaken.

Me: I’ve never played Hide and Bark.

Nell: Obviously not.

Me: Why?

Nell: You have an unconvincing bark.

Me: Is it only for dogs, then?

Nell: No. Princess has an excellent bark but is poor at hiding.

Me: It’s difficult for a seal to hide. I can’t see Malcolm barking.

Nell: Nobody can see anyone barking. That’s the whole point. Anyway, Harriet is undercover.

Me: Why?

Nell: We’ve had a nasty incident with a rogue spider.

Me: Oh no.

Nell: Henry and Horst were doing their rounds with David when they got caught in its web.

Me: Dave got caught in a spider’s web? How big is the spider?

Nell: Not David. Henry and Horst. Horst managed to wriggle free but Henry is still stuck and the spider is refusing to release him.

Me: I don’t want to be mean but I think the spider is going to notice Harriet.

Nell: Harriet isn’t after the spider. We think The Hunter is behind this and has started turning the insects bad.

Me: I’m a bit frightened of spiders.

Nell: I can’t believe you just said that. They are the kindest of creatures.

Me: But they have long hairy legs.

Nell: I think there are a lot of people with long hairy legs during this lockdown so I would be very careful what you say.

Me: You know what I mean.

Nell: Well, you are wrong. Sidney has never behaved like this before.

Me: Sidney?

Nell: Stop distracting me. We need to free Henry.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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