Me: What on earth is Kev doing?

Nell: What are you talking about?

Me: In that photo on the beach?

Nell: Auditioning, of course.

Me: Auditioning?

Nell: Yes. He’s an actor, isn’t he?

Me: I know. But on the beach?

Nell: Gladys needed the right atmosphere.

Me: Gladys?

Nell: Would you kindly stop repeating everything I say?

Me: I’m just a bit confused.

Nell: Gladys is directing the pantomime this year and we are hoping to perform it on the beach.

Me: I didn’t know. What is it?

Nell: Robin Woof and his Merry Dogs.

Me: Is Kev auditioning for Robin Woof?

Nell: No. Gladys sees Kev as King Richard.

Me: I didn’t even know there was going to be a pantomime.

Nell: Didn’t you?

Me: Nobody asked me to audition.

Nell: You and I are better working behind the scenes. You can write things down. It’s more your thing.

Me: Who is going to play Robin?

Nell: Everyone wants to play Robin.

Me: I thought they might do.

Nell: Even Malcolm.

Me: Now that is surprising, although Susan would make a lovely Maid Marian.

Nell: I think Maid Marian is between Harriet and Sally, although Myfanwy might have a chance.

Me: Who is auditioning for Robin then?

Nell: Jim the Farm Dog, David, Malcolm, Alejandro, Mutley and Poppy.

Me: Mutley?

Nell: I think he just nodded at everything to be honest. He’s auditioning for Maid Marian too.

Me: Fair enough. I’m not sure Alejandro is quite right for Robin but I can see Poppy in the role. She’s ever so good with a sword.

Nell: Yes, pantomimes traditionally cast females as males and males as females so who knows.

Me: Maybe Mutley will be cast as Maid Marian?

Nell: Drink your tea and stop talking nonsense.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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