It’s been an exhausting few days

Me: Where are the puppies?

Nell: Sleeping under the kitchen table after two rounds of bacon sandwiches. You need to stop calling them puppies. They are two year olds.

Me: I know. Where is Sally?

Nell: The Cat and Gladys have taken her to the spa for a pamper day. David wanted to go too but he fell asleep and we thought it best to leave him so Harriet stayed behind too.

Me: It’s been an exhausting time for everyone.

Nell: Yes, Knitwear Wolf only just got back from Dartmoor. He went by motorbike of course as David had to travel in the helicopter with Sally.

Me: I like his cardigan today. Dark red. Very Christmassy.

Nell: Rupert always dresses well and at this time of year appropriately too.

Me: This might sound a little fanciful, Nell, but I thought I saw a large caterpillar in a Trilby hat talking to itself in the garden.

Nell: Was it eating a Cornish pasty?

Me: Yes.

Nell: That’s Colin from The Chronicle. He’s not talking to himself. Don’t be silly.

Me: But he is eating a Cornish pasty and wearing a hat?

Nell: Of course. He’s a reporter. They have to grab food where they can. He’s interviewing Henry and Horst.

Me: I see. It all makes sense now.

Nell: The Chronicle is doing a piece on bravery and Henry and Horst are an obvious choice.

Me: I agree but I can never hear what they’re saying.

Nell: Nobody can, except David. He’s an excellent listener.

Me: Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Me: Colin seems to be waving at us with his tail.

Nell: He probably needs his bowl of tea.

Me: Can’t he have a cup like everyone else?

Nell: He’s a caterpillar. No hands. Do keep up.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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