Me: What an amazing time we had on the beach in spite of the rain.
Nell: Yes. Did I just see you eating chocolate cake for breakfast?
Me: It’s Alice’s birthday. Cake is allowed.
Nell: Why?
Me: It’s a family tradition.
Nell: I don’t think you should go on the bouncy castle until later then.
Me: No. Perhaps not.
Nell: Would you like to hear my poem?
Me: Very much.
Nell: ‘This poem is for someone I happen to know
Who came into the world 35 years ago.
A beautiful someone both outside and in
Beloved by us all, especially Jim.’
Me: Why especially Jim? He’s Harriet’s boyfriend.
Nell: It rhymed. Stop interrupting. Harriet doesn’t mind. Where was I?
Me: Talking nonsense about Jim.
Nell: ‘We love you so much it’s hard to explain,
Way past the moon and twice around Spain’
Me: Spain?
Nell: Quiet.
‘A daughter, a sister, a mother now too
Yes, darling Alice, I’m talking about you.
‘So today is her birthday?’ we ask with great joy.
‘Will there be cake and a going home toy?’
Me: What?
Nell: Everyone likes a going home toy. Do keep up.
Me: But we don’t have any going home toys.
Nell: Of course we do. You didn’t think all those unicorns were yours did you?
Me: I wondered.
Nell: ‘Jonathan Sky has asked me to say
That you’re the best mummy and he’s agreed it with Faye.
They love you the mostest that any child could
And they’re both trying hard to be ever so good.
But David says anyone can make a mistake
And anything is possible as long as there’s cake.
So Happy Birthday Alice from everyone here
We love you so much you are dearer than dear.’
Me: She is.
Nell: She knows.
Me: Yes. Sorry.