Welcome back, Tony.

Nell: Well, David couldn’t have been more pleased to see Tony.

Me: I know. It made me feel quite emotional.

Nell: Antiques Roadshow makes you feel emotional.

Me: Dave was so happy. He saw Tony’s van and he rushed to welcome him.

Nell: We all did. Tony has been away far too long. The other postmen were very nice, of course.

Me: Yes, they were.

Nell: But they weren’t Tony.

Me: No.

Nell: Tony is like family.

Me: Yes. Are you coming with me to the hairdressers this afternoon? Only Doug was wondering.

Nell: Stop interfering. Doug and I are just friends. Anyway, I’m having tea with The Cat if you must know and the passing spaniel.

Me: What passing spaniel?

Nell: The one who called the RNLI. His name is Sebastian and he lives in Salcombe.

Me: Does he now? One of the yachting crowd?

Nell: Why are you looking at me like the dog who caught the biscuit?

Me: I’m not. Are any of the others coming to tea?

Nell: No, they are busy.

Me: Dave is never too busy for tea.

Nell: Mutley is in London, David has gone surfing, Harriet is out with Jim.

Me: And Poppy?

Nell: Poppy is having lunch with Tall Hollywoof. They are talking bread.

Me: Is he the one from Bake Off?

Nell: No. Where did you get that from? He’s the Giant Schnauzer who runs a bakery near Kingsbridge. Piercing blue eyes. Excellent buns.

Me: Really? I hope John the Doberman isn’t jealous.

Nell: It’s only a friendly lunch. Poppy wants advice on a sourdough. Now stop interfering.

Me: Yes, sorry.

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