Me: Is there a reason why you’re wrapped in a Small Person’s Duvet and Dave is eating the Dog Drying Towel?
Nell: David is not eating it. He is Carrying It Around.
Me: I wish he wouldn’t.
Nell: It’s his most favourite thing to do, apart from Eating and Cuddling.
Me: And the duvet?
Nell: I was feeling the cold and David kindly brought it to me.
Me: You have blankets. That duvet is for the grandchildren.
Nell: Sometimes blankets simply won’t do.
Me: I know what you mean.
Nell: Now, if you were thinking of asking for bacon this morning please don’t.
Me: But I’m sure I could smell it earlier.
Nell: I’m afraid it all went at First Sitting.
Me: First Sitting?
Nell: The early dog catches the biscuit. Or in this case the bacon sandwich.
Me: Don’t you mean the early bird?
Nell: Don’t mention birds to me. Your friend Robin is becoming decidedly rotund, by the way.
Me: Robins are meant to be round and he’s not just my friend. Did you see that beautiful sunset yesterday?
Nell: I did.
Me: Robin knocked on the window to tell me to go out and see it. Wasn’t that sweet of him?
Nell: Robin should ring the bell like everyone else.
Me: I don’t know why you’ve taken against him.
Nell: You spend far too much time with that bird.
Me: I enjoy chatting to him. He’s an excellent conversationalist and he gives me the bird’s eye view on life.
Nell: May I remind you that it is Conversations with Nell not Robin.
Me: You’re jealous.
Nell: Stuff and nonsense.
Me: At least Robin has time for me. You’re always too busy to chat.
Nell: What do you think we are doing right now?
Me: Oh yes. Sorry.
