Nell: Stop lurking behind me. I know you’re there.
Me: What are you doing out here?
Nell: Counting Birds. It helps to pass the time.
Me: We count sheep.
Nell: That’s far too easy. Birds are more unpredictable and require greater focus.
Me: Not all birds. Flamingos aren’t unpredictable and neither are penguins.
Nell: How do you know? Have you ever counted them?
Me: No.
Nell: Well then.
Me: Have you come to a decision about Strictly? Are you going to be head judge?
Nell: We discussed it at Morning Thoughts and the general consensus was that I would be the perfect animal for the job.
Me: I agree.
Nell: Everyone seems confident that I will be fair and honest with my judging and not swayed by emotional attachments.
Me: Are you talking about Beauregard?
Nell: Certainly not. I was referring to David. My nephew.
Me: Of course.
Nell: And Poppy is like a sister to me.
Me: Poppy?
Nell: Poppy is a professional dancer. Her Paso Doble is renowned all over the world.
Me: Is that the dance with the bullfighter and the cape?
Nell: Yes. Traditionally the man is the bullfighter and the woman is the cape.
Me: I see.
Nell: But that’s not the way Poppy does it.
Me: I’m guessing she’s the bullfighter.
Nell: Correct.
Me: Isn’t she rather small to be a bullfighter?
Nell: There is nothing small about Poppy.
Me: Except for her size.
Nell: Size is relative. Marvin’s friend Rhubarb is an excellent dancer and she’s a Bernese Mountain Dog.
Me: Will she be performing?
Nell: Possibly. Restrictions permitting, as she will have to fly here from Canada.
Me: I wouldn’t have to fly in from anywhere.
Nell: You are not a professional dancer.
Me: Not yet.
Nell: Not ever.
Me: No. Sorry.
