Me: It was rather grey and blustery down at the beach, wasn’t it?

Nell: It was.

Me: Although, judging by your mood, it might be stormier at home.

Nell: This simply cannot continue.

Me: What have I done now?

Nell: It’s not you. It’s Poppy. She’s completely out of control.

Me: Poppy seems in the best of spirits to me.

Nell: Exactly.

Me: I was only just saying to Sir Malcolm and Sir Manuel that I haven’t seen her this happy in a long time.

Nell: And there you have it. Manuel can’t be a Sir. He’s from Barcelona.

Me: Manuel can be whatever Poppy tells him he is like Lady Gladys and the Royal Llamas.

Nell: The llamas are not royal and Gladys is not a lady.

Me: I beg to differ and the Duke and Duchess of Devon would agree with me.

Nell: There is no such thing as a Duke and Duchess of Devon.

Me: Of course there is. If you look out of the window you can see them enjoying a morning bagel from the Baron’s coffee cart.

Nell: All I can see is David and Harriet. And Babycakes Gillespie is a pug not a baron.

Me: He can be both you know.

Nell: This has got completely out of paw. Poppy cannot go around knighting everyone she sees.

Me: It isn’t everyone. Walter is still a commoner and Timothy refused the title.

Nell: Timothy is laying low. It’s a dangerous time for turkeys.

Me: Rupert was a prince already so he is in no need of a title but I think Lady Nell really suits you.

Nell: I will only accept that honour from the King himself.

Me: I think Count Henry and Count Horst would urge you to reconsider.

Nell: Good grief.

Me: Sorry.

Me: Every time you go to your hydrotherapy session with Chloe all Poppy and the puppies do is wait for you to come home. It’s the sweetest thing.

Nell: They aren’t puppies. They’ll be 6 next year.

Me: They’ll always be puppies to me.

Nell: I lost half a kilo, by the way. Chloe is extremely pleased with me.

Me: Well done. Kev’s lost weight too.

Nell: It’s probably the worry. It’s a stressful time.

Me: I should have lost loads then but I haven’t.

Nell: Of course you haven’t. You’ve been living off cake for weeks.

Me: It’s comforting and Poppy makes the best cakes.

Nell: I know but as soon as you’ve got through this we will be starting a new regime.

Me: Can we start it after Christmas?

Nell: I’ll think about it.

Me: I was talking to the cancer nurse yesterday and she said my operation might be on 9th November.

Nell: Good.

Me: I have to call them next week to find out.

Nell: Write it on the whiteboard, please.

Me: I have. The nurse was really kind and said I can call her any time and no question was a silly one.

Nell: She’s right.

Me: She asked me if I had a good support network and I told her it was amazing and I couldn’t ask for more.

Nell: Yes, we are rather impressive if I say so myself.

Me: Sir Roger Blubbery brought me a mackerel this morning.

Nell: Why on earth did he do that?

Me: He had one going spare. The Beefies are supplying him with constant fresh fish. He’s their favourite.

Nell: And stop calling him ‘Sir’. He hasn’t been knighted yet.

Me: You’re wrong. Poppy knighted him yesterday.

Nell: Poppy can’t do that.

Me: She already did. Sorry.

Me: Why are you giving me that look?

Nell: You’re not supposed to be downstairs at this time of the morning.

Me: I couldn’t sleep. And why is Dave watching me from behind the kitchen table?

Nell: He’s hoping for bacon.

Me: I’m afraid he’s going to be very disappointed. I’m only having cereal.

Nell: David is never disappointed for long. He’s not that kind of animal.

Me: I’ve been thinking about Myfanwy and her worrying news.

Nell: Here we go.

Me: If her mother is Lady Anwen does that mean she is Lady Myfanwy?

Nell: Possibly.

Me: Now that we’ve lost The Queen are the royal corgis still royal, or have they been downgraded? King Charles might choose to upgrade another kind of animal entirely.

Nell: He might.

Me: Sir Roger Blubbery has a nice ring to it.

Nell: King Charles isn’t going to have royal seals and if he is then I doubt if Roger Blubbery will be first on the list.

Me: Why not? Roger Blubbery is a local celebrity and monarchs always have seals. See what I did there?

Nell: I’m choosing to ignore you.

Me: Do we know if Lady Anwen has been in touch with Myfanwy since her escape?

Nell: I don’t think so.

Me: She’s a proper nasty piece of work that one.

Nell: Are we suddenly in the middle of a novel by Charles Dickens?

Me: I’m just getting into the feel of it all.

Nell: Well, don’t.

Me: I used to call Dave ‘The Artful Dodger’ when he stole things as a puppy. Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: David is still waiting at the kitchen table, by the way. If you don’t have any bacon the least you can do is give him a bowl of cereal.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: It was absolutely beautiful down on the beach.

Nell: Yes, just what we all needed.

Me: You and Kev enjoyed the view as always and the others looked everywhere else but at the sea.

Nell: They aren’t interested in views.

Me: You’re right. Harriet is an action dog, Dave loves mooching and Poppy is battle ready.

Nell: Somebody has to be.

Me: I just wish Poppy would chill sometimes.

Nell: She only does that at home.

Me: Thank goodness she didn’t bring her sword.

Nell: Not yet but I’m afraid she has been in talks with The Cat about a belt and scabbard.

Me: Oh dear. Is that really necessary?

Nell: Now, there’s something I need to discuss with you.

Me: What have I done now?

Nell: Nothing. It is about Myfanwy and it is highly confidential.

Me: How exciting.

Nell: Rupert told me this in confidence.

Me: You’d better not tell me then.

Nell: Don’t worry. He knows I’m going to tell you. We both thought you needed a distraction.

Me: I do.

Nell: This doesn’t mean you can go telling everyone though. Or start looking at Myfanwy with a funny face.

Me: I don’t do funny faces.

Nell: Yes, you do. You screw up your eyes and purse your lips.

Me: Do I?

Nell: Yes. So don’t.

Me: I won’t. Tell me.

Nell: Myfanwy has found out that she is adopted.

Me: That’s not unusual, Nell. You’re all adopted. Kev and I adopted you.

Nell: I’m talking about her biological parents.

Me: Aren’t they Welsh corgis?

Nell: Yes, but not the ones she thought. Myfanwy is descended from royalty.

Me: That’s wonderful.

Nell: Not when your mother is Lady Anwen.

Me: Is that why she helped her escape?

Nell: Yes. Stop screwing up your eyes.

Me: Sorry.

Nell: That’s a photo of your little sister with Harriet and David.

Me: Yes, it’s her birthday today. Happy Birthday darling Panda.

Nell: Her name is Alexandra.

Me: She will always be Panda to me.

Nell: She’s been a great comfort to you over the past few weeks, hasn’t she?

Me: Yes, she has. I know I can count on her for sensible advice.

Nell: Especially when you get carried away.

Me: Yes. She’s coped with a lot over the years and nothing phases her.

Nell: You’re lucky to have her in your life.

Me: Yes, I am. Both my sisters have been wonderful and as soon as this next operation is over and done with we’re going to do some proper celebrating.

Nell: Good. Why are you up and dressed at this time of the morning, by the way?

Me: I have to go for another blood test.

Nell: They’re certainly keeping a close eye on you.

Me: Yes, they are and I’m very grateful. Although I wouldn’t actually choose to start the week by having my blood taken.

Nell: The sooner you go the sooner you will be back.

Me: That’s true.

Nell: Now, you were feeling a little overwhelmed yesterday, weren’t you?

Me: I was a bit emotional.

Nell: That’s to be expected. It’s been a traumatic few weeks and much as you were expecting it to be cancer it’s still difficult to hear.

Me: It is.

Nell: Don’t be afraid to tell us how you’re feeling and remember it’s okay not to be okay.

Me: Yes.

Nell: Do you want the rest of that delicious toast and marmite?

Me: No. I’m not really hungry. Would you like it?

Nell: I suppose I might manage a little. As I always say, ‘Sharing is Caring’.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: The beach was quite busy, wasn’t it?

Nell: It’s the weekend.

Me: I always love watching the kite surfers. They can fly right up into the air you know.

Nell: I do.

Me: It looks like great fun.

Nell: Don’t even think about it.

Me: I’m not.

Nell: Kite surfing, or any kind of surfing, is not for you.

Me: I know.

Nell: Walking and swimming will do just fine.

Me: Yes.

Nell: Now, in view of the weather and recent events, Poppy has decided bacon sandwiches are in order for Sunday breakfast.

Me: Dave will be delighted.

Nell: David already sampled a few during the taste test.

Me: Why was there a taste test?

Nell: Customer feedback revealed that the bacon needed a little more crunchiness.

Me: Customer feedback?

Nell: Yes.

Me: Nobody asked me.

Nell: It was a selected few.

Me: Are we talking about Dave here?

Nell: Harriet and I might have helped.

Me: Have you lot been scoffing bacon sandwiches behind my back?

Nell: A Labrador never scoffs. We enjoy.

Me: Are we having a roast later?

Nell: Yes. Roast chicken with all the trimmings.

Me: I hope David isn’t sampling that.

Nell: He may have tried the odd sausage or two but nothing more.

Me: I have a lot of thanking to do again, Nell.

Nell: Yes.

Me: People are being so wonderfully kind and supportive.

Nell: They are.

Me: It means the world to me.

Nell: I know.

Me: Just knowing how much people care gives me strength.

Nell: Good, because I know you’re very tired.

Me: I am a little.

Nell: How about a quiet day in front of the fire with a book?

Me: Sounds perfect. Will you be joining me?

Nell: Of course. You and me. Always.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: Why are you all watching me? Is Poppy on her hind legs?

Nell: Have you finished writing?

Me: I don’t know where to begin.

Nell: Yesterday the hospital called asking you to come to a consultation about your results on 31st October.

Me: I knew this was bad news because I was expecting a letter and they only ask you in if they have bad news.

Nell: You were extremely distressed so Kev told you to call them back and ask to speak to a doctor.

Me: They didn’t want to tell me over the phone but when I explained that I knew it was cancer and I was imagining the worst they were understanding and a doctor told me the results.

Nell: It is skin cancer and it is malignant melanoma.

Me: But we’ve caught it early enough and it hasn’t spread.

Nell: It’s also under 1mm thick which makes it low risk.

Me: I’ll have to have another operation in the next few weeks as they want to do a Wide Local Excision to remove the area around it to make sure they’ve got everything.

Nell: But then it’s yearly checkups.

Me: And I’ll need to check my lymph nodes regularly.

Nell: You must also check for any signs of a change in moles or marks.

Me: Yes. Noticing that and going to the doctor has saved my life.

Nell: And telling everyone about your cancer journey will save others.

Me: Please go and see a doctor if there’s anything you’re worried about.

Nell: So, even though you have cancer this is still a cause for celebration.

Me: It is.

Nell: And we’re all behind you.

Me: I know and you’ve been amazing.

Nell: Those are tears of relief.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: No sorries. Not today.

Me: Why is Dave bathed in sorrow on the non slip mat in the living room? Poor darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: Bathed in sorrow? Good grief.

Me: Were you mean to him about Exercising Restraint? He was only showing affection.

Nell: Stealing socks is not Showing Affection.

Me: True, but that wouldn’t make him sad. You’ve definitely said something.

Nell: David’s sorrow has absolutely nothing to do with me.

Me: Who is responsible then?

Nell: Shel, if you must know.

Me: Shel loves Dave. He loves all of you.

Nell: Not enough to stop him jetting off to Cannes.

Me: It’s MipCom, Nell. The television market I used to go to in the past. It’s work. Shel has to go.

Nell: Well, David can’t believe Shel is leaving today. He only just arrived.

Me: I know but he’s planning on coming back for a longer visit next year.

Nell: David’s not sure if you’re just saying that to make him feel better.

Me: Are we still talking about Dave?

Nell: Of course we are. Why?

Me: You’re sad about Shel leaving too. Admit it.

Nell: I might be a little sad. He is a dear friend.

Me: Your friend John Keats was rather charming yesterday.

Nell: Good change of subject.

Me: It was lovely to be back at the Cottage Hotel again and fancy bumping into Sunny and Sue.

Nell: It was delightful to finally meet Sunny.

Me: Yes. she voiced you so beautifully in the audiobook.

Nell: She did.

Me: She is another dear friend. I’m very lucky to have so many of them.

Nell: You are.

Me: Would you call John Keats a dear friend?

Nell: No, I would not. Now, fetch my handbag please, we need to take Shel to the station.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: We’re going to have to do something about David’s behaviour with guests.

Me: Why?

Nell: He climbed all over Shel and started kissing him.

Me: Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: He must learn to respect boundaries.

Me: Shel doesn’t mind. He loves dogs, especially Labradors.

Nell: Shel is my person. We were friends before David was born.

Me: Shel and I were friends before you were born but I don’t mind him cuddling you.

Nell: I don’t do cuddles. A light stroking of the head is quite enough for me.

Me: I’m aware.

Nell: David doesn’t seem to realise that people don’t necessarily want to be embraced by a large animal.

Me: I know he doesn’t.

Nell: You do realise that he went upstairs and stole Shel’s glasses.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: And climbed into his bed.

Me: That’s a bit much.

Nell: I’m afraid this is going to be discussed at Morning Thoughts.

Me: Don’t be too hard on him, Nell. He means well.

Nell: David is going to have to learn Restraint and Moderation.

Me: Good luck with that.

Nell: Are we driving to the Cottage Hotel for lunch today?

Me: Yes, we are.

Nell: Good. I’m looking forward to a nice prawn sandwich by the sea.

Me: I’m looking forward to meeting Rupert’s rival.

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: John Keats the handsome Harrier Hound.

Nell: John Keats is merely a friend.

Me: Unlike Rupert?

Nell: Rupert is more than a friend.

Me: I knew it.

Nell: He’s family.

Me: Yes, he is to us. Like Shel. But Rupert might be more than that to you.

Nell: Nothing means more than family.

Me: You know what I’m saying,

Nell: Did David just walk past us carrying Shel’s glasses?

Me: I’m afraid he did. Sorry.

Me: What lovely photos, Nell. Thank you for choosing them.

Nell: My pleasure.

Me: I adore that one of you two smiling.

Nell: I know you do. Now, you’re bound to be feeling a little emotional today as you can’t be with your daughter.

Me: I am.

Nell: But we’re all here and so is your dear friend Shel.

Me: It’s lovely to see him again.

Nell: So we’ll all celebrate Alice’s birthday together.

Me: Yes.

Nell: I’ve written a poem. Would you like to hear it?

Me: Very much.

Nell: ‘Today is an awfully important sort of day

Ask David, or Harriet,

Or Jonathan, or Faye

A certain Special Someone

Beloved by us all

Is Having a Birthday,

Shall we just call

Her Alice, or Mummy, or Darling will do,

Or simply dear Tink,

Or sometimes just You,

Whatever we call her

We love her so dearly

That sometimes it’s hard

To explain it quite clearly

And we have to resort

To cuddling her tight

And kissing her fiercely

Like bears in a fight.

Let happiness abound

Watch out for the llamas

They’re jumping around

In flowered pyjamas.

The Welsh Corgi Choir

Are singing with glee

As animals queue

For Poppy’s afternoon tea.

There are sandwiches, ice cream

And a big birthday cake

With ‘Alice’ written on it

So one can’t make a mistake

And eat it accidentally

Which can happen of course

To rather large Labradors

The size of a horse.

Please know dear Alice

On your special day

We are with you in spirit

No matter how far away.’

Me: That’s perfect, Nell. I just wish I was there to give her a birthday hug.

Nell: She knows she is loved.

Me: Yes, she does.

Nell: And that’s all that matters really, isn’t it?

Me: Yes. Sorry.