Me: Have Poppy and Malcolm gone to their Anger Management class?
Nell: Yes. An extremely impressive big black Mercedes arrived with tinted windows.
Me: Very gangster.
Nell: Yes, although the driver was rather a surprise.
Me: Why?
Nell: I wasn’t expecting a crow.
Me: Was it wearing a hat?
Nell: Yes. But that’s not the point.
Me: Did it say anything?
Nell: No. It was unusually silent for a crow.
Me: Not everyone likes to chat.
Nell: No. Malcolm wasn’t happy about it. I could tell. His feathers tend to droop.
Me: Oh dear. What about Poppy?
Nell: She was already in confrontational mode so she just got in and waved her sword.
Me: Did the crow react?
Nell: Not really. It just nodded and muttered something into its microphone.
Me: Microphone?
Nell: It was wearing one of those head sets.
Me: I know the ones. Hands free.
Nell: Exactly.
Me: But crows don’t have hands.
Nell: No, they drive with their feet.
Me: What about steering and changing gear?
Nell: They have beaks. It was probably an automatic. Stop fussing.
Me: Do you think you could call Poppy on her iBone?
Nell: What for?
Me: I don’t have a good feeling about this, Nell.
Nell: Good grief. You’re letting your imagination run away with you again.
Me: Please.
Nell: All right, I’m doing it. Do calm down.
Me: Is it ringing?
Nell: It’s gone to voicemail. They left a while ago so they’re probably in class now.
Me: Nell, the house phone is ringing. What’s the matter? Who was it? Tell me, please.
Nell: It was Peter the Afghan who runs the course. Poppy and Malcolm never arrived.
Me: What?
Nell: It looks like you were right to be worried. We need a family meeting now.
Me: Yes. Sorry.
