Not Up for Discussion

Me: Can I get you another pillow?

Nell: No, this is just right, thank you.

Me: You know that’s my chair, don’t you?

Nell: Only when you’re there.

Me: I am here.

Nell: You weren’t.

Me: I am now.

Nell: I have arthritis, you know.

Me: Yes. I know that, Nell.

Nell: And we are in lockdown.

Me: I know that, too. Anyway what’s that got to do with the price of fish?

Nell: Nobody was talking about fish. It’s far too early for fish, apart from in Scandinavian countries where, according to Olaf, it’s eaten all the time.

Me: Who is Olaf?

Nell: A Norwegian Elkhound, so he should know.

Me: It’s just a saying and actually fish is eaten everywhere for breakfast. The Cat has smoked salmon and everyone loves a good kipper.

Nell: They do not.

Me: Well, some do.

Nell: Did you hear that Chloe is not allowed to give me my hydrotherapy treatment?

Me: Yes. It’s ridiculous. I don’t know why it isn’t allowed. It’s only you and Chloe in the treatment room.

Nell: It’s not essential, apparently.

Me: It’s lucky we’re doing our regular walks.

Nell: Earl Grey is essential.

Me: Yes. We couldn’t possibly manage without a cup of tea.

Nell: Or scones.

Me: We probably could manage without those.

Nell: I beg your pardon? Don’t let Poppy hear you say that.

Me: Scones aren’t essential, Nell, and neither is bacon.

Nell: I can’t believe you just said that. Bacon sandwiches and Poppy’s scones are what have been keeping this family going through the hard times.

Me: And cake.

Nell: Cake is not up for discussion. There absolutely has to be cake.

Me: There are not a lot of things up for discussion, are there?

Nell: No. Including this chair.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.