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Try and Be Realistic

Me: I thought you might like some photos of happy times on the beach.

Nell: I would like that honking to stop. I can’t concentrate on my book.

Me: Timothy is teaching the goose the ‘Robin Woof’ song and it’s making him laugh.

Nell: That’s good to hear as he hasn’t had a lot to laugh about in the last few months. Christmas is such a trying time for turkeys.

Me: I think the goose is rapping. It should really be called Drake.

Nell: It’s a goose not a duck and what on earth is it wrapping? Christmas is over.

Me: Never mind. It was a joke.

Nell: What is its name anyway?

Me:’Do you think you could say that again?’

Nell: Why would I want to do that?

Me: No. That’s its stage name. It does stand up comedy. It’s called ‘Do you think you could say that again?’

Nell: Stage name? Good grief. Couldn’t it just be a straightforward Canadian goose? Well, I’m certainly not calling it that. Does it have a real name?

Me: Yes. Ginger.

Nell: Ginger? That’s a dreadful name for a goose.

Me: I know but it made Timothy laugh.

Nell: At least the large beasts have moved back into the barn. We must be thankful for small mercies.

Me: Yes. Knitwear Wolf organised some warm blankets and Jim provided fresh straw.

Nell: I’m hoping the weather improves for the pantomime this weekend. We don’t want soggy feathers.

Me: Or fur.

Nell: Quite.

Me: I’ve just had a thought.

Nell: Oh dear.

Me: Timothy should change his name to Fred and then he and Ginger would be the perfect couple.

Nell: What a ridiculous idea. Timothy doesn’t dance and Ginger is a stand up comic. Try and be realistic please.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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